She’s Your Boo, Not Mine
As a woman, I have always believed that it was right to respect the boundaries of another woman’s relationship.
True, I may be single, and that man is damn fine, and has been giving me googly eyes for the past couple weeks, but I know he has a girlfriend.
So what have I traditionally done? I have backed off. Over the past few months though, I have been talking to my male friends about these “man laws” they have. In these conversations, it sometimes seems to be true that dudes don’t give two good damns if a woman is in a relationship. If she is giving him the “I want to throw it back at you” face, he will go in for the kill. So of course, I got to thinking…
Does title of “boyfriend and girlfriend” really mean anything?
Like, what does it mean to be in a relationship? People put these labels and boundaries on what can really be narrowed down to a simple equation: a great friendship + emotional connection x exclusive sex a few times a week if you’re lucky or month = a “relationship”. But my question is: what does this really mean? If he is willing to creep between the sheets with some other chic, there is something in the equation that doesn’t balance out on both ends. Is exclusivity the only thing that holds it all together? Other than that, it just seems that you two have a really great friendship con thronxing.
If he is not respecting his girl, why the hell should I?
Who is more wrong here: him for trying to get with another woman, or the woman for responding to his advances? The new chic of interest is not in a relationship with her. He is. He has “loyalty” to her. Yet his actions clearly show that he: 1. doesn’t respect her; 2. doesn’t respect their relationship; 3. is looking for something he’s not getting at home, (be it freedom, or something more) or; 4. some combination of those. So in all honesty, “WHAT DO I GOT TO RESPEK?” (See Duke Luke in “Glory Road”).
Marriage is another ball game.
Marriage is covenant under God. True, if he stepping to another woman, he is clearly willing to break that covenant. But that is where the buck stops. Can’t go messing around with promises people made to God. And engagement is a step in that direction, so, yeah. Stay clear of that too.
Don’t Judge Ms. Jenkins
And if you do, ah well. But seriously ladies, let’s give this some real thought. No, I am not condoning going after men with girlfriends. Nor am I talking about you trying to start a relationship this man who is not being faithful. I am just putting it out there. Food for thought, if you will. Women always have all these rules about who is or isn’t fair game, out of “respect” for the other woman. For what purpose? Fear of karma? Our own peace of mind? And fellas, does a woman’s “commitment” to another man make her off limits for you? What say you all?
Sowhatiff – I don’t owe her nuffin…right? – Jenkins
80 Responses to “She’s Your Boo, Not Mine”
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I respect the other woman for fear of Karma, for fear that he won’t respect me later (in the same way he is disrespecting me), for peace of mind (I wouldn’t want anyone doing me like that.)
I’ve learned through experience though, that a man doesn’t have any obligation to me or anyone else, unless he specifically states that you two are together. He can act like it all day, but when it comes down to it, if there is no verbal confirmation, you are just a occupier.
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I am glad that someone brought this up, because I have very strong views about the concept of “boyfriend-girlfriend.”
I’m going to keep it very real here. I personally think it’s BS. Not only do men not honor the relationships of other men, but very few of them take the whole “boyfriend-girlfriend” thing as seriously as girls do. Really, what does it mean? I find it very hard to stand behind a version of commitment that states “For now I really like you, but when I’m ready to be out, I’m going to be out.” Honestly, we’re all just dating. Some under the veil of exclusivity, some not. But if it’s not a permanent commitment, it’s not an actual commitment in my eyes.
I dealt with a few guys in relationships in my collegiate years. I stay away from that now simply because I don’t want the drama of some chick being upset with me over a man she’s claiming as “hers” but who clearly is not behaving as such.
As far as the third party on the outside of an “exclusive” relationship, I don’t feel like they owe anything to that said relationship. That third party did not commitment him/herself to anything, it’s the duty of the people within the relationship to respect it. If they uphold the agreement themselves, why should someone who had nothing to do with the formation of that relationship have any responsibility in maintaining it?
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Boot Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 4:43 pm
“If they uphold the agreement themselves, why should someone who had nothing to do with the formation of that relationship have any responsibility in maintaining it?”
Re: I am glad you kept it very real in your comments. I have enough to worry about on the day-to-day basis without having to worry about someone else’s relationship stability. If people (male and female) would stop holding back in their relationships and give it their all (110%) the other person would have no need to seek out satisfaction/fulfillment somewhere else. Too many people these days only put just enough into the relationship to keep the other person around, instead of putting their all in because they are afraid of being hurt. But if you find out your s/o is cheating on you…aren’t you still hurt?
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You are dead right on this one Miss Jenkins. My responsibility to my gf is just that…. MY RESPONSIBLITY. You shouldn’t even be bringing it up. If I’m down to jump and you are down to jump, lets find the bridge.
Think about it, if the reason I didn’t cheat is because I got turned down, that is just as bad as cheating.
If the shoe is on the other foot, I don’t care about who you care about. I care about what you look like naked or do you like it when I slap your ass or are you one of those feminist who find it degrading? If your man aint my boy, its on YOU to stop me. I find it a turn on touching OPP (yeah you know me). I might just be BOLD and ask you who is better.
Only thing.. if you know I have a girl and I’m still flirting with you… you better understand THIS IS NOT A RELATIONSHIP! I got one of those and I don’t need another. I am looking for some freshmeat AND THAT IS ALL YOU ARE!
But that was all in my past…. I’m too lazy to start an affair now.
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 11:15 am
concur
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Cheekie Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 11:39 am
“Think about it, if the reason I didn’t cheat is because I got turned down, that is just as bad as cheating. ”
This is that trueness.
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chocolatebaby Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:18 pm
As a female that started back dealing with an ex that has a live-in girlfriend, we both made it clear the we were not trying to rekindle anything. If we are in the same room for longer than 10 minutes it is only to make plans for later or getting ready to do what grown folk do. I don’t come in between his home life and he doesn’t come between mine. Each of us are responsible for making sure we keep our own home lives straight and well nourished.
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RightCoastLexSteele, Di Gyal Dem Sugah Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:45 pm
God Bless America.
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CHeeKZ McCheat Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 4:18 pm
And God Bless Low Matience PumPum
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RightCoastLexSteele, Your Girlfriend's Guilty Pleasure Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 4:39 pm
Hear hear!
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As a man I really don’t care if a woman is in a realtionship with another guy. If me and him aren’t friends then that really has nothing to do with me. If she doesn’t respect their relationship then there is no reason for me to respect it. My philosophy has landed me in a couple of arkward situations in the past but I chalk that up to the territory.
Some people couldn’t knowingly start with someone who is in a realtionship for fear of that shit coming back on them. I feel like if you are handling your business in a relationship then your s/o isn’t going anywhere. If they do then do you REALLY want them anyway?
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I don’t want to share a man knowingly or otherwise… I’m just selfish like that. If he’s taken, I don’t want him. No matter how “insignificant” he says his relationship is; no matter how “unhappy” he professes to be or how much he and his girlfriend/wife are on “bad terms” right now – I don’t want any part of that.
For karma reasons alone, if you as a woman/man ever plan on having a blessed, monogamous, committed union with someone, you’re casting bad pebbles into the waters of life when you cheat with a person who is in a relationship, I think. Especially if you KNOW you couldn’t handle if the shoe was on the other foot and YOU were the one being cheated on.
To me, a relationship, if nothing more, boils down to your ability to keep your word. Will you never be attracted to anyone else but me? HIGHLY unlikely. Will other women not flirt, drop hints, and offer their “calling cards”? HIGHLY unlikely. Will you and I stay in peaceful bliss for eternity and never allow any disagreements to make us consider breaking up and moving on? HIGHLY unlikely. We’re human. While we are in this exclusive (<— operative word, here) relationship, I DO have full expectations that you will keep your word and be open and honest when feelings/situations/intents change BEFORE you act upon those feelings (if they negatively affect our relationship). I offer nothing less in return.
For you women sleeping with other women’s boyfriends/husbands believing he really is miserable in his relationship, he’s going to leave her soon, he’s only their for the child/children, etc. – you’re too old (no matter how old you are) to be so silly. People stop doing things when there is no longer a reward for them. He’s getting SOMETHING out of it that’s worth his while… Nine times out of ten that SOMETHING will be reason he’s STILL with her after he busts you out, strings you along and leaves you high and dry.
Get your own man, honey, and leave her’s alone.
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 11:57 am
I agree with everything u said.
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ChokLitFactory Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:35 pm
I totally agree 100% as well. Not a fan of the Homewreckers…
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This topic is entertaining. I have a story worth bolding.
Back in college there were a couple chicks that had boyfriends consistently. Like they had been dating their dudes for years. One chick’s man went to a different school. She liked Vitamin D more than the average lass. A few men that I know would see the dude come up and visit and as soon as he left they would be back to trying to smash his girl. All of them smashed…at separate times though. There was one time where one of the dudes was laying in the nude with her while she was talking to her man on the phone. After she convinced her man that she was out with the girls, she hung up and then wopped him down. Awfulness. She then tried to pursue a relationship with the side dude later on. That didn’t go anythere. Respect was lost.
This other chick, prolly engaged at this point, was the smeez of smeezes. She got the train of trains run on her at an off-campus spot. And when she was too tired, she volunteered her girl’s services. And I quote:
“Don’t put it in my mouth. Put it in hers!”
Both of these chicks went home to boyfriends, and of course none of the dudes cared. These are the type of incidents that made me cautious and not so trusting of the opposite sex. So yeah, I guess a relationship title doesn’t really mean anything sometime.
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 11:44 am
WTF! I am so disgusted….
“This other chick, prolly engaged at this point, was the smeez of smeezes.”
Yea ruin it for all of us!!! grrrr
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Slim Jackson Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 11:45 am
Yeah, they f*cked it up for a lot of yall.lol. I started really refining my search criteria as a result of folks like them.
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RightCoastLexSteele, Your Girlfriend's Guilty Pleasure Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:04 pm
God Bless that off-campus location.
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ife1love Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:17 pm
Like Diamond said: “It’s bitches like you who make it harder for women like me.”
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Steph Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:05 pm
Ugh, Slim. I truly hope these women you ran across in college days are in the very small minority of how women really act. I’ve NEVER heard of this behavior and if any of my girl friends acted like that I would be completely shocked and want to do something to help b/c clearly they have a major lack of self esteem or something.
About the whole bf/gf title…I was just having this convo w/ my friend the other day. Doesn’t it seem like so rare for young people to claim that status? Like if you think to way back in the day it was “going steady,” then “boyfriend/girlfriend,” then “we’re talkin’,” or “hangin out,”….now you see SO many people in these fake relationships b/c they don’t have that official declaration talk. I dunno maybe it’s just me but I feel like dating and relationships now a days are so carefree and without committment. Like the post states too, even when you do have that title, clearly many people do not honor that committment.
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:47 pm
You’d be suprise at how often this happens, I would argue that at least one girl in your circle (maybe not a close friend) has a skeleton or two or twelve in her closet
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GOLDEN_LADY Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:07 pm
HAIL TO THEE NAWL!!!
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:08 pm
They were triflin and prolly had self esteem issues????
**only explanation I got ***
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:10 pm
“There was one time where one of the dudes was laying in the nude with her while she was talking to her man on the phone.”
HARRO!!!
That’s the devil’s work LMAOOOOOOO
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CHeeKZ McLovin Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:19 pm
Slim I hate to correct you…….
But the 2nd girl, who RightCoast and his cohorts ran through while her freind “just watched to make sure she was safe” than caught the Tatar Sause Sandwich. She was NOT with her current man at the time…. He wifed her TWO DAYS LATER!
Plz keep in mind, the day inbetween her being in love and this successful train.. I TRIED to run a train on her with like 11 dudes, knowing what she had just did with Lex the night before. However, my man was violently drunk and ruined it for everyone.
It probably makes you guys feel good knowing that this SUCKER DUDE is a member of another frat. I have nothing bad to say about the first girl, other than the fact that she let me entire team smash except me.
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:42 pm
How did u let that occur? You put the whole team on w/o puttin yourself on?
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:47 pm
Slim should do a post solely about Trains
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Slim Jackson Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:56 pm
You know what man. You’re right. I will do a post about trains. It’ll be the easiest post that I’ve ever written since I’ve witnessed so many of them. Great Idea!
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:04 pm
Ive been lookin for a forum where i can tell all these stories…
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Cheekie Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 4:30 pm
“Slim should do a post solely about Trains”
Maybe call it: The Metro Ho?
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RightCoastLexSteele, Your Girlfriend's Guilty Pleasure Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:20 pm
“RightCoast and cohorts” makes it sound like I participated. What more than likely happened, I was present for moral support/transportation and was busy giving the business to my one true love, Marilyn Jane.
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RightCoastLexSteele, Jah Youth Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:11 pm
Occurences like these have led me to begin research to develop a website called “Ho-fax”. It’s similar to “Carfax.com” where you can find out the real facts before you buy. Match.com, you are going DOWN!
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:16 pm
Do you need an investor?
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:17 pm
Ok is your site going to be similar to :www.dontdatehimgirl.com ????
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RightCoastLexSteele, Di Gyal Dem Sugah Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:51 pm
Peyso: You know it!
B&TT: It’s going to have more class than dontdatehimgirl.com. While I know of a very deserving person get his just due on that site, it doesnt lend itself to full disclosure. On my site, if shorty lied about a bj in high school, you will know.
P.S. Can I e-boo you up? I see a lot of e-loving going on, we might as well join the party
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 4:02 pm
E-loving?
Mi rass… wah u tek dis fah?
lolllllll…How about I just blow you an e-kiss for now?
I like to take my time
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RightCoastLexSteele, Di Gyal Dem Sugah Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 4:14 pm
Lol…I take this as something to do other than what I get paid to do. But mi ah go tek mi e-kiss for now and guh ah mi yaad.
Translation for the Yankees: Thank you for the kiss, I’m going home now.
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ife1love Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:20 pm
lmao… mad about it.
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Vanessa aka Miss V Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 8:38 pm
ummm… can you write a post about what motivates men to “run train” on chicks? i just don’t get it…
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When I’m in a relationship I get more passes. I guess our animalistic natures are enhanced when someone is off limits, it makes the chase more satisfying?
I have never found myself in this particular situation (todays’ post) and I hope to never be in one lol…I usually back off from a guy who is in the midst of turmoil in a relationship, whether he be a friend or romantic interest because unless I am giving counseling, I don’t want to be a part of the drama. If he persists on being with me despite the “situation” he is in, it tells me 2 things a) he does not respect himself b)he has not emotionally matured. You are right, the other woman or boo is not your problem at all, she is his problem. But to me getting with him means that his girl will become your problem down the line.
Stay clear danger up ahead!!!
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Hmm, I love this post, Sowhatiff. Got me thinking and ish.
Personally, I DO co-sign your “who has loyalty” argument. It’s why I always hate those talk shows when the the boyfriend cheats and the woman always goes after the
hussy’sother woman’s weave in an attempt to whoop that arse. And I’m just sittin’ there WAITING for her to do the equivalent to her own man and I’m still there…waiting.That said.
If I were the supposed “other woman” the booed up man has eyes on, I’m not sure I’d be able to go through it. Out of respect for the woman (even if I don’t know her from Eve), but more so out of respect for myself. I mean, I’d have to look at myself and ask, “What does it say about me that I don’t feel I’m worth a man who isn’t fully committed to me?”. And furthermore, as has been expressed above, who’s to say he won’t do the same thing to me? What makes me different? He’s already shown himself to be shady and why would I want to deal with that baggage? Especially if it’s another woman’s baggage!
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Slim Jackson Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:05 pm
As much as I hate to say it, if I found out shorty did greeze or was in the process of scheduling greeze, I’d definitely choke slam the dude. My issue should definitely be with her and the lack of respect for me, but I got too much testosterone. Besides, if I choke slammed her, people would start callin me Breezy.
Damn, too soon…
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Cheekie Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:37 pm
LOL @ too soon. I do wonder, though, if jokes are fair game now that she’s back with him. Sorry, another topic, another time.
But, yeah, I wasn’t just talking about physical violence, a good tongue lashing (that sounds um…pause) is included in that, too. I can’t stand when the woman ONLY admonishes the other woman. It just reeks of no self-respect because she’s obviously ignoring her man’s wrongdoing because she’s going to stay with the douche.
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ChokLitFactory Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Feel you on that Cheekie.
Also, from what I’ve seen, when you deal with a boy that already has a female, you are asking for Drama and you are asking for subsequent Beatdowns. Its hard sometimes, if you honestly did not know the person had a significant other, but if you did know and you didn’t care? You deserve what you got coming to you.
I prefer to avoid the drama.
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Yeah… Just think about what you’re getting, side-dish, leftover wise – Uggh! Growing up, I remember hearing two women arguing about a man… I still cringe to this day whenever I think about the implications of what was said… Main B*tch to Side B*tch, “That’s aiight… Just remember when you’re kissing him you’re tasting my p*ssy…” ‘Nuff said.
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CHeeKZ McLovin Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:05 pm
at our age, no matter who you date your tasting someone else’s grundle. Get over it and just pray the person washes their face.
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:11 pm
OMG! Brush & Floss too lmaoooooooo
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Robin Monique Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:23 pm
My thoughts exactly.
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I have went round and round this concept in my head. I agree with Robin – it means a lot more to women most of the time than to men. But, this girl is (presumably) not making up their relationship. At some point he told her he was hers or made her feel that way.
While I don’t think you can “cheat” on a boyfriend or girlfriend, I do think that you are being dishonest. So, while I am not wholly against dating someone’s “boyfriend”, I am against dating lying scumbags.
On the other hand, men are rarely COMPLETELY single. They find a new girl before getting rid of the old one. So as upstanding as we try to be, we have all probably been in that situation more than once unknowingly.
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Relationships were concocted by women to make them feel better about themselves about all that fornicating they do before marriage. This clearly was not a man’s idea. And besides, didn’t every man in the Bible worth his salt have multiple wives AND concubines? Could have just been some old testament ish, but hey, It Was Written.
Secondly, it is most certainly not my responsibility to respect her and her boo’s relationship unless he’s fam, or closely linked to someone that I know and have enough respect for that I can extend that courtesy to them based on my relationship with our common friend. Other than that, her relationship/engagement/marriage is about as valuable to me as a torn $2 bill. From my experience, it’s usually not the dude that treats his girl well that gets cheated on, it’s the dude that’s out there *blatantly* cheating on his girl.
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Robin Monique Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:21 pm
“Relationships were concocted by women to make them feel better about themselves about all that fornicating they do before marriage.”
PREACH!!!!
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:42 pm
I must say that sounds like good logic to me…
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:22 pm
Lex, u have money fi tek care of concubine & multiple wifey?
Interesting you brought that up…yea back in the mother land thats how our ancestors used to live…but the multiple wives were needed to take care of multitude of pickney (no rubbers back then) and vast acres of land…times have changed…not saying it wouldn’t work in this present day and age…but
that lifestyle was not just to meet the sexual desire of one man…it was a give and take team work y’know all that good stuff…
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ife1love Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:25 pm
Also usually in most cultures where they have plural marriages, the husband must state his intention to have “others” BEFORE they get married. There’s no slide-offs or bottom b*ches, everybody knows their role ahead of time.
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RightCoastLexSteele, Your Girlfriend's Guilty Pleasure Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:33 pm
I’m never getting married, and I can always dip into my neighbors vast array of concubines. And from what I’ve observed in the islands, you dont need wife nor concubine to have a croccus bag full ah pickney.
And yes, I got enough money…I’ve just always considered myself more of a “Joe Grind” than a “John Mind”.
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GOLDEN_LADY Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:36 pm
tsk…lol
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:38 pm
Grimey!!! ROFLLLLLLL
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I JUST dealt with this dilemma…and folk WOULD NOT believe me if I told who dude in question was-but every time I thought of it I just could not lower myself to the position to be the side skank. I have too much self respect to knowingly give the presidential bidness to some greedy azz mofo who’s already wifed up or boo’ed up with some other chick! There is FAR too much exquisite, UNATTACHED quality “paynus” OUT THERE to resign myself to the being the oh-so-lowly bottom beotch. Eff karma, that’s the only thought I needed to tell this cat to make like a frat and STEP.
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ChokLitFactory Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 4:01 pm
Hahahah! Great comment!
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i have experiences on both sides of this topic. I’m going to play the other side of this discussion, just to lend some perspective.
Not every so-called “side chick” is trying to settle down with the guy she’s dating. Not every woman looks for “the one” in every dating experience. I’m not trying to tie down every dude I meet. Some guys, you just want to enjoy their company every now and then. I wouldn’t look for any semblance of a relationship with a guy whose committed himself to someone else but that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy the experience for what it is at the moment.
Furthermore, not all “side chicks” have a low sense of self-worth. This may come as a shock but some women enjoy being single, having options and not being obligated to anyone as much as men do. Not every woman wants or needs to give her heart all of the time.
But this goes back to my original theory on the bf/gf thing, which is why I stay away from titles all together. The only commitments I’m interested in are the ones with “forever” attached. Everything else is just dating in my eyes.
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ife1love Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:21 pm
Furthermore, not all “side chicks” have a low sense of self-worth. This may come as a shock but some women enjoy being single, having options and not being obligated to anyone as much as men do. Not every woman wants or needs to give her heart all of the time.
Thank you! I’m not one to jump into bed w/ some other woman’s man, but it has happened and I didn’t at all feel bad about it, nor was I trying to replace homegirl.
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:59 pm
Word. The “side chick” isn’t always trying to be the main chic. Sometimes she just wants to get her’s too. Though I must say, women’s history doesn’t make this the likely assumption.
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:41 pm
I am slowly moving towards this line of though, Robin. Partly because of the dirt I’ve seen done by both men and women in relationships, and also because, it seems that no commitment is really valid until the vows are read and said. Before that, folks are really free to do whatever they want as evidenced by the fact that…they do.
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I also find it very interesting that we’re being so hard on women who date men in relationships, while NO ONE’S addressing the men who date women in relationships. Just another example of the double standards in dating mores. smh.
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:34 pm
not double standards, just not the topic of discussion. i see that discussion all the time lol
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GOLDEN_LADY Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:35 pm
Well, I pointed out that they’re greedy and I had noo problem puttting him in his place. You’re right though…I can think of some nasty azz bogus dudes in college…but can’t divulge the situation because the parties involved may see this blog…lol.
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:05 pm
do tell
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Tunde Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 12:54 pm
I’m not judging women that do it. More power to y’all. lol
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:36 pm
Isnt that the way it always goes though? Men getting off easy. Pause.
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Somehow in the past 20 some odd years, my conscience grew from a midget amongst a crowd of ball players to Kimbo Slice with James Earl Jones’ voice holding a speakerphone.
I know I’m in the minority, but I can’t get down with chicks who have a man. Hurts my soul. There’s enough single women out there, or at least women who tell me they’re single, for me to be content.
Plus, it’s just bad karma.
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Sorry for my absence folks. Mad errands to run. Anyway, just wanted to say that I love the dialogue. Yall are mad funny, honest, and its great. thanks. keep the party going.
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 1:59 pm
Eff yo errands hahahahahaha
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 2:25 pm
say that to my face.
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RightCoastLexSteele, Your Girlfriend's Guilty Pleasure Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 2:33 pm
Tiff, you remind of the little puppy that used to hang with the big dog from Looney tunes back in the day. Sure do alot of talkin’….
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Back on the Scene, its PEYSO Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 2:36 pm
Explain to her that she aint tuff
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 3:14 pm
Both of yall chumps already know what the deal is.
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I believe that women do hesitate: 1) for fear of karma & 2) because they ask “What if it was the other way around and I was the s/o & some chick was with (creeping) my man.
Well, as a guy I don’t think about that kind of stuff until after the fact lol. Once the alcohol is in my system and all the girls in the club start to looking better than they did at the beginning of the night….they are all fair game. And if she has a man but chooses to go home with me (or take me to her place) it’s not my fault. Perhaps she is looking for something she is not getting from her man or is trying to get back at him for cheating, etc. Either way I am here to help her with what she may be “needing.” As others have said before me, if she doesn’t respect her relationship, then why the hell should I? That’s her problem!
Yeah, cheating is not something that should be done by those in a relationship, but it happens everyday and isn’t gonna stop anytime soon. If you are not legally married and tax time comes around….how do you file under the marital status section? Single rite…thank you!
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Robin Monique Reply:
March 2nd, 2009 at 4:29 pm
“If you are not legally married and tax time comes around….how do you file under the marital status section? Single rite…thank you!’
Exactly.
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OMG, i can’t believe so much time has passed since i last posted. i was def suffering from 3ways withdrawl. work has been driving me crazy lately!
but anyway, though i’m mad late i’m going to respond anyway. my mom always says if a dude with a g/f is trying to holla, holla back lol her logic is, since they aren’t married, he can def be an option, esp if he’s a good catch.
however, my whole thing is… if he’s willing to step out on his current g/f, what makes me think he wouldn’t do the same to me? with that in mind, i’m hesitant to make moves on a dude that is already “taken.”
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I agree with a lot that has been said and I think it just boils down to a few things. Being in a relationship is really just a title and what really matters is a clearly stated set of expectations that you have with your SO. The only absolute or official commitment is marriage and until then, you just have to trust that the other person won’t hurt you without them having made that commitment to you.
I also agree that when it comes down to it, it is not in any ways your obligation to concern yourself someone else’s relationship. However, we should thing about the dangerous repercussions of messing with someone who’s already taken. People are crazy and there is no telling that if I’m messing with someone’s man that that they’re not going to try and cut me in my sleep. Not to mention the amount of STDs spreading like wild fire.
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