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Dining in Hell’s Kitchen
Has nothing to do with the post, but it cracks me up.
I’ve become quite enthralled with the show Hell’s Kitchen. If you’ve never watched it, it’s Iron Chef on steroids. It’s basically a competition featuring a range of culinary stewards from all over the nation exhibiting their skills in a series of challenges, under the watchful eye of a d*ckheaded, obnoxious Scotsman. Yea, sounds like everything else on TV, I know. Hey, the “adapt a foreign hit show” idea had to run it’s course at some point. In any case, watching a few episodes I already have a few questions…
1. Son…are you really all up in my food like that?
There has to be a better way to ensure the food is cooked to your liking other than sodomizing it minutes before it comes to my table. I suppose you have to taste it while it’s cooking and all that, but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t taste my plate once it’s all said and done. Getting food ready for prep is one thing, but once it’s cooked and on my plate I’ll be the judge of it’s quality. And I definitely don’t want you dipping the using the same spoon to Just use one of those thermometers or something to make sure the food is cooked. Bobby Flay don’t be all up in the food like that.
b) Who is you talkin’ to?
Gordon Ramsay talks to people like they are his redheaded step children. His condescending Scottish accent just adds insult to injury. I mean…it’s just a kitchen…calm down son. I spoke to sushi chef this week that told me most kitchen’s worth their salt are intense, but Ramsay’s style is a bit over the top. (There you have it. Undeniable empirical evidence from one sushi chef in Upstate NY). God bless the individual’s that get yelled at like that in kitchens daily, but I couldn’t do it. Trust, the first time Ramsay threw an undercooked squash at me would be the last time his jaw functioned the properly. By no means should you handle people with kids gloves, but it’s only so many times you’re gonna get in my face like you’re the drill sergeant from Full Metal Jacket…in a f*ckin’ kitchen. I also understand you’re reputation is on the line blah blah blah, but I’m still gonna need you to take down it down a notch. It would be fair if restaurants allowed their guests to yell directly at the head chef if their dinner isn’t up to par. Imagine how great it would be to throw an overcooked salmon filet at a chef and yell “Does that feel light and feathery dumbass?” (Badman nuh play pause) But I suppose life isn’t suppose to be fair.
iii. Can I still eat at one of these places?
The short answers is more than likely yes, but I”m going to have a hard time paying for less than stellar multiple star food. Shows like Iron Chef gives insight in the techniques and dedication of highly regarded chefs, but the Gordon Ramsay’s shows seem to show another side of what goes on behind the scenes. Some of the food that kitchen assistants have attempted to peddle out to patrons is almost laughable so you can imagine what might hit your plate on a busy night when a chef might miss something. I can put up with salty french fries that cost 3 bucks, but having send back a steak that’s clearly not medium rare is disconcerting.
I’ll still get duped into going to a fancy restaurant and getting overcharged for ambiance and reputation, but I’ll probably do it less often after witnessing some of the horrors. Speaking of horrors, did you hear about that whole thing about 90,000 confidential military documents being leaked on the internet? Isn’t it crazy that Pakistan is using the same money we give them in aid to fund the Taliban? How the f*ck did that happen? Oh wait…the questions at the end are supposed to actually be about the post right? Oh well…maybe next week.
16 Responses to “Dining in Hell’s Kitchen”
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There has to be a better way to ensure the food is cooked to your liking other than sodomizing it minutes before it comes to my table.
^^^This statement made the whole post worth reading!
And i LOVE that part of Coming to America!
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I just got into the show this season. I’ve noticed a lot of the same stuff. Regarding #2 tho…you can’t really blame them if you pledged right? Lol. They get a job instead of the letters, but I see a lot of similarities.
They are gunning for my girl Autumn tho! #Ionlyrootfortheblackpeople
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The Honorable and Rather Articulate Award Winning RightCoastLexSteele, LLC, Dark as the Night that covers me Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 3:30 pm
Autumn has to go. She’s only maintaining by sheer luck, and I’m pretty sure she’ll be one of the two to go next week.
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Man you need to see his other show “Kitchen Nightmares” now THAT show…will make you cringe….eeew!
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Please Excuse Your Significant Other Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 8:36 am
I was fittin to say the same thing
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Working in culinary is intense. We have a restaurant in the school I work at…apart of the culinary department. I’m cool w/ the head chef/teacher. And when I’m up there freeloading…he yells at those kids just like Ramsey…and they hit him w/ “Yes Chef”
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Yes! I love “Hell’s Kitchen”!
Ramasay Gordon in real life is not that intense..his brand requires that he be a complete lunatic on these shows…for ratings, drama, etc..but, in his real kitchen he is more toned down..his other show “The F Word” shows him in his own kitchen in England and he is less intense….
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Hm… I thought I was the only one who loved these culinary shows. Hell’s Kitchen, Food Networks Next Star, Iron Chef, etc.
1. I prefer not to think that they sodomize my food. I don’t go to fancy shmancy restaurants often so I just like to think it comes prepackaged. LMAO.
2. This is why you don’t work in a kitchen. You can’t be all overly aggressive in the kitchen. You can’t be hitting folks w/ steak & salmon… punching someone’s lights out cuz you forgot the dill.
3. I don’t eat there often enough for it to disturb me. So sure.
–and about those documents. I wanted to die for B-rock (Obeezy) I was like D@MN SON. They next thing I did was check all the settings on my work cpu. No leakages here… whew lawd.
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QueenT Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 2:31 pm
I watch ALL the food shows too! I am a foodie all the way…love to cook and love to eat!
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OH… & that picture… EPIC.
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don’t watch the show but those pakistan documents are causing some pure phuckery at work. matter of fact I shouldn’t even be on 3ways today
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The Honorable and Rather Articulate Award Winning RightCoastLexSteele, LLC, Dark as the Night that covers me Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 3:30 pm
24 is only fun when it’s not happening in real life.
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I only watch hell’s kitchen to see chef call someone a stupid cow as he throws a pot of risotto across the kitchen! Lmao just thinking about it. But my most favorite cooking showbis chopped!
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He’s TOTALLY to d*mn intense.. That junk is crazy..
it’s like, “Who the Eff is you talkin to, dude!?”
There was some kind of symposium with Alton Brown, Bobby Flay and some other people.. Someone in the audience asked Alton Brown what he thought of Gordon Ramsay.. in short, “he’s well respected, but there’s no reason for anyone to speak to people like that..”
Ramsay is a douche’..
#YeahImFancy
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That picture, tho… *DEAD*
IT’S MY BIRFDAY BISHES!!
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I only “watch” these shows via the Soup.
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