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Don’t Be a Hot Ghetto Mess. Please.
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So I went to a step show on Saturday night. I intended to take pictures and videos to post, but I figured I’d get myself in trouble if I “critiqued” the performance of a few organizations publically. I also don’t wanna lose any readers in the process, so I’ll just say this:
This was one of the overall worst displays of stepping I’ve ever seen with the exception of 3 organizations. The high school kids that opened up the show were better than most of the orgs that competed. That’s a very serious problem. I’m only comforted in knowing that the money I paid to get into the show went to a good cause.
Now that I got that off my manly chest, I can proceed to today’s topic of acceptable fashion. No, today isn’t the day that Slim goes metro or turns into some fashion guru. Today is the day that Slim voices his outrage regarding the attire of certain individuals. Now while I was at the show, I got a headache from bright pink spandex and high-pitched voices. I also felt my jaw hit the floor when I saw people wearin’ costumes that were most likely acquired from the Disney store. Now I can live with the headache and jaw hitting the floor for the reasons I described at least for a little while. I CANNOT and WILL NOT accept a 5’7 180-200 pound woman rocking lycra/cheap Eastbay catalogue spandex from legs to shoulders lookin like her name is Big Bertha Fae. From 15 or so rows back, I should not be able to see a whirlpool in your clothing where your belly button is sucking in the fabric you’re rocking. I should not be able to see your bra fighting to contain the mounds of mammary tissue that are your breasts bouncing 6-8 inches from where they normally rest. That sh*t is unacceptable!
Why is it that some people overstate the degree to which they are comfortable with their own bodies? I can respect confidence. It raises sex appeal. But damn, know what type of clothing accentuates your good features and what type of clothing will have you in a picture on HotGhettoMess.com. That is not a good look. Don’t go out there with your junk all exposed saying “You know I look good!” cuz honestly you really don’t. And ladies, if this is your friend consistently trying to pull this off, please stop her. It’s for the better of society.
Now this doesn’t just apply to women. Men can be incredibly sloppy creatures wearin skin tight shirts that cut off circulation thinkin they are showing off some type of muscle or walkin with their shirt off with some truly awful teeth and a bottle of something potent in hand. That’s an equally bad look. I’m just saying that confidence is cool. Overconfidence is not. Be proud of who you are cuz everybody can’t be a Halle or Boris, but do your best to keep yourself presentable at public gatherings. Otherwise, you’ll end up being the fuel for a blog post written by a guy named…
P.S. This that type of ish I’m talkin about…
Please ladies, do not ever be this woman.
52 Responses to “Don’t Be a Hot Ghetto Mess. Please.”
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Dying laughing.
Man…I know I can be guilty of doing bad things fashion wise, but I don’t think I ever get terrible…unless it’s wearing skyscraper shoes…is that an offense?
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ladebelle Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 10:01 am
skyscraper shoes? is that like really high stilletos?
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Jac Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
Yep…tall, skinny heels…
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That is extremely funny and true.
I can honestly say that I don’t (and won’t) be wearing anything near like that.
I’m the friend who isn’t afraid to let her friends know that “that sh!t don’t look right!, you need to pick something else”.
I’m bold and blunt and my true friends know this about me and that is why they are still my friends.
Both of them.
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ChokLitFacory Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
LOL
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I AM going to critique the outfits worn at said step show. Not because I’m hating but in truth and sisterly love.
First, my sorors wore outfits that clearly they thought were cute and no one had it in them to tell them that because it’s pink and green is not a good reason to wear them. My eyes were HURTING at the technicolor of it all. Not to mention a couple of them needed to be wearing Spanx. I wont even go into the stepping, it was disappointing at best.
I was embarrassed for the SGrho’s especially with the wardrobe malfunction that took place, but I guess that is what happens when you, an adult that clearly has no business in an unreinforced spaggeti strap, wears an outfit intended for a 6 year old. I agree with you slim, it is not attractive at all, to think that someone convinced those women that it would be cute. It’s all about knowing your limits, of what does and does not look good on you.
It seemed to me that it was mostly the big girls that were stepping were coming out of their clothes. the Delta’s were not exempt from this either.
As a member of the Big Girl Club, I know what does and does not flatter me. I am not going to wear an outfit intended for a six year old because it looks good on my size 6 girl friend, no matter how much she convinces me its cute. Part of the problem with us Big Girls is that our self worth and esteem is controlled by our size (at times) and if we are having a good day we can be convinced to squeeze oursleves into something we have no business wearing. Ego is a trip.
I see it alot with women who are teetering on the edge of being members of the Jr. Big Girls Club. They just fighting to fit into the trendy sexy clothes to maintain their sexy.
But what I have discovered is that confidence is sexy and sexy is a state of mind, not in what you wear, or how something is displayed on you. But either way you need to be real with yourself as to what flatters you and what you need to stay away from. And you need to get real friends that will tell you to stay away from certain fabrics.
Just my .08
(Sorry it’s so long)
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Jac Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
I like you more and more.
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Vanessa aka Miss V Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 6:00 pm
well said!
lol @ Jr. Big Girls Club
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leggings: not for everyone
1. Yes, this applies to you too.
2. If there is cottage cheese present (even just a “lil bit”) when you turn around and look in the mirror, the tight spandex won’t camouflage it.
3. No, not even if the tights are black.
4. Skinny/slim does not equal toned therefore the cottage cheese rule even applies to you, slim.
4b. yes, even you
5. Those tights, yeah they are see through. That means I see your bloomer flower power undies.
6. If you had the thought that “Maybe I should just wear jeans with this outfit, I am not sure how these tights are looking.” If you say that to your “friend” and she said “Girl don’t worry about that little jiggle and/or dimple, you look good! You only seeing it because you are looking hard and besides only a dog wants a little bone to hold onto.” You should NOT wear those tights and that girl is not your friend.
that is all
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JG* Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 8:39 am
iDied.
LOL This is hilarious.
Fashion is the one thing that most people love to get twisted. Skinny people too. Self-expression can be good, bad, and ugly.
I wanna hear the critique of the show! We’re people of thick skin. But I know I’m good to get pissed when I see disappointing shows. Here in the South stepping is like a badge of honor.
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NickiSunshine Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 10:14 am
“5. Those tights, yeah they are see through. That means I see your bloomer flower power undies.”
LOL.. this kilt me. I can’t get into the leggings and the short shirts… who wants to see your crotch/ camel toe action (I get it, men I know you do BUT, for the sake of fashion, it should be avoided)
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ife1love Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 10:47 am
I am a huge fan of leggings they are in fact my official weekend wear. However, you should NEVER have a camel toe in your leggings. There is no excuse for that. Don’t let those who are in denial about their girth ::pause:: scare you away from leggings. Also… in my opinion, leggings should not be worn with tops that are short enough to reveal your goodies unless you are exercising (running, biking, etc). Tunics please folks, tunics!!!
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Slim Jackson Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
I’m in support of the camel toe statement here. I don’t particularly get excited when it looks like the lips on her face are smaller than…well, you know, the ones that can be seen through the pants. Not sexy. Not hot. Not for me. Not now. Not ever.
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ChokLitFacory Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 12:44 pm
THANK-YOU!! I also am a big fan of leggings, especially the $45 American Apparel ones that have been in style for a while now. And I agree, leggings + short top = YUCK! not a good look. I prefer longer, flowing tops, over-the-shoulder tops or long tank tops with a belt.
But question, Am I wrong for bustin the bright Gold lame (pronounced lah-may) leggings on those special nights I want to ‘stand out’ ??
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
AMEN on tunics!!!!
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
“Gold lame (pronounced lah-may) leggings on those special nights I want to ’stand out’ ?? ”
Sister Choklit: I’m gonna have to say Yes.
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
I am going to have to second that….metallics, glitter, and any type of sequin-like materials should be done in small dosages…
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had to say Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 11:15 pm
Please DO NOT wear the lame leggings…it wasnt cute in the 80s and it not cute now…
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Slim Jackson Reply:
December 16th, 2008 at 9:57 am
had to say,
Since I haven’t seen this name before/in a while, welcome (back) to Three Ways!
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It’s like this–just because they make it in your size–does not mean and I repeat–does NOT mean, it’s meant for you to wear it.
It’s funny that you used the words HOT GHETTO MESS. My 8 year old cousin saw something yesterday and said those words—and the truth is I agreed with them. LOL
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But seriously, does that chick in the pics shirt match her stretch marks???
I am very fashionable and I am gonna go ahead and toot my horn for a minute (if I will)… I can’t stand when folks go out and spend hundreds of dollars on name brands (Baby Phat, Apple Bottom, what have you) and think that just because it’s a name, it should be worn.
It really doesn’t take much to be fashionable… you don’t have to spend a wealth of money on it (just stay away from Rave and 5-7-9 if you are over age 15!).
People just need to open their eyes and look at some fashion magazines, instead using videos, the Source, and Vibe for tips… they’re good for entertainment but not real life.
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ladebelle Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 10:04 am
true story right here nicki… true story…
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NickiSunshine Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 10:12 am
thanks chica.
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ife1love Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 11:10 am
LMAO @ “But seriously, does that chick in the pics shirt match her stretch marks???”
Hilarious!
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Too funny! me and my friend we’re just talking about people this weekend! We went to this really upscale bar & grill where people of great taste mingle and sip. This hood figure had the audacity to show himself in a Coogie track suit, the ones with the wiggly line pattern (?), and a multi colored patched sweater! his girl was dying of embarrassment and the look on my face said it all to her. And for the dudes with muscles… no tight shirts period! especially if there is a gruesome view of nipplage. not cute, no sir.
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Slim,
I agree that the current state of stepping is horrible. The last few stepshows I’ve attended in the DC Metro area have been horrible. I understand the frustration of watching high school down to elementary age kids stepping better than the regular organizations.
The fashion. I gave up. People will wear what they will wear cause “damn it, they look good”. Yeah right.
Unless we get another major shift in fashion, and get out of the ’80 punk/rock era, I see this sad trend will continue.
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Intellectual Hedonist Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
Shawn, stepping has gotten progressively worse with the years, it has gone from hard core stepping to mini videos to a variety show. I mean really I would stay home and watch Rosie O’Donell if I wanted a variety show. Just step and do it with some precision and in an outfit that is not going to lead to a wardrobe malfunction.
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temps Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 11:04 pm
“get out of the ‘80 punk/rock era” Hell yea!!!
The reason we geeked in the 90s over baggy everything cuz the 80s “tight everything” sucked and swallowed..theres a reason some over 25 arent rocking retro 80s, the fashion was awful.
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ROTFLMAO!!!! and i have now discovered why i read blogs first thing in the morning… this is hysterical and really changed my mood today!
i definitely feel you. this whole i-love-the-80s-even-tho-i-didn’t-live-in-it movement is for the birds… hot pink spandex? i mean, rih-rih can get away with shit like that because she’s flawless and a celebrity… wannabe celebrities? not so much… they end up bringing new meaning to fashion faux-paus…
this kinda reminds me of the post that i wrote “just cause they make in your size”… we know the rest!
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temps Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 11:10 pm
Oh I agree with you too. The acid stone wash jeans, pjs, et al as your gear meant you had no gear. Rocking Reebok pumps and tight Levis meant you was on the “corny side of things” and it still does. Shoot I got some Cole Haans with the Nike air bubble and a pair of lucky jeans, ben sherman with cufflinks..when I rock that aint no shorty checking for Dude born in 87 and thinks that he’s rocking 80′s “fly gear” which he is not. Thats called Guess and Polo which spilled over into the 90′s fashion scene (and Hillfigure and Russell followed suit..literally).
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@ Shawn: The ’80s punk/rock era isn’t leaving until a rapper/r&b singer says so. Pisses me off.
@ ladebelle: Blogs are sometimes better than breakfast.
@ Reign: Only time I’d ever wear anything skin tight is if I was competing at a track meet. Under Armour does wonders for definition.lol.
@ JG: Intellectual Hedonist did a good job on the outfit criqitue.lol. The show overall was sub-par as far as performances go. Your folks did hold it down as expected, BUT I’ve seen better shows by the bunch.
@ Nicki: Great points about where peeps get their fashion tips.
@ the others: I’ll respond more later. I actually gotta work this morn!
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NickiSunshine Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 10:12 am
Thanks Slim.
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Peyso who likes his burritos con queso Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 10:31 am
Under Armour is that crack
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Intellectual Hedonist Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
I love under armour… but that aint for everybody either. And some men should not be wearing them all tight. It looks just horrible
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reign Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 10:33 am
a man who runs track is a lovely sight might i say. indeed, i have to agree lol.
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
God. YESSSSSSS. I second Reign.
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Vanessa aka Miss V Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 6:07 pm
oh yes indeed!
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temps Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
…gotta bop like this cant wear skinny jeans cuz my knots wont fit”
….the JIGGA man
from “Swagga Like Us”
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“I’m just saying that confidence is cool. Overconfidence is not.”
Co-sign! And usually those who scream the loudest are just trying to over-compensate for their LACK of confidence.
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Just terrible..but honestly im not even really shocked by this picture.
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I feel sorry for ladies like MISS (tiger stripe ass -no panty wearing-gut spilling over da pants) HOT MESS. Somewhere in her life her mama AND/or girls told her that she looks hawt in dem type of clothes and told her that in order to get noticed by the opposite sex she has to let it all hang out and maybe even spill on the floor….ONE SIZE DOES NOT FIT ALL!!!
I am sorry you had to see that Slim…you must traumatized…
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Slim Jackson Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
Point to note. I didn’t actually see that chick who is in the picture. The chick I saw was wearing a “semi-royal” color scheme and wasn’t really spilling over. She could have been a professional wrestler though.
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Intellectual Hedonist Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
Slim so wait you didnt see here protruding bloomers or her N!pple when she lost her top for the 4th time?
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Slim Jackson Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
I think we may be talkin about 2 different people. Both of which had issues.lol.
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Nyela Goodness Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 4:46 pm
Two different people. The sad part? Both are in the same org. I guess one can’t tell the other if they both a hot mess. smh
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reign Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
“Somewhere in her life her mama AND/or girls told her that she looks hawt in dem type of clothes and told her that in order to get noticed by the opposite sex she has to let it all hang out and maybe even spill on the floor….ONE SIZE DOES NOT FIT ALL!!!”
The scary and honest observation, as I’ve seen it here in Dallas, is that her mama and her friends probably dress that way too. The cycle never ends. It’s like they own fun house or magic mirrors. One day brave souls across the nation are going to have to say enough is enough, call them out as the monstrosities that they are, and hopefully not get shot or sat on.
Dang, I told myself after church yesterday I was gonna be nice… oh well, I’ll start tomorrow
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I have actually had a conversation with one of my girls about her “hellnawish” attire at the clubs/outtings, she was mad for a couple of weeks, but after we made up I did notice a change in her clothing and a positive change in the types of the attention she was getting. All of this to say: Tell your girls when they cutting up on the wardrobe tip, they’ll thank you eventually.
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Slim Jackson Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 4:33 pm
Did she ever tell you what her logic was for why she was dressing a hot mess and thinkin it was fly?
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Naturally Alise Reply:
December 16th, 2008 at 9:25 am
No one ever told her the truth, she really thought she was doing something, glad to be the one who save her from herself!
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Slim Jackson Reply:
December 16th, 2008 at 9:59 am
When yall are having a “ladies night out” outing/vacation like 5-10 years from now, this will come up and she will thank you for saving her love life.lol.
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i agree with the whole tell-your-friend-that-she-looks-awful-in-that-outfit thing. trust me, there have been plenty of times when i’ve let my opinion known, and sometimes they listen, and other times they don’t.
really, though… if they want to look a mess, let them rock. who am i to say that they look bad? hey, they may not think i look good, even though i think i’m hot fiyah. so who’s right? confidence is cool and all, but you don’t want to kill ur friend’s self-esteem by critiquing their look.
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My theory as to why women do this which probably doesn’t apply to all women, but I know a lot of my female friends hate the thought of moving up a size. Whether it be from a size 2 to 4, or a size 22 to a 24, there is just something psychological to know you’re moving on up and not in a good way. The connection being the refusal to buy clothes in that size up that would make you look way better, and feel better. Therefore causing you to wear clothes that you have no business doing anything with but giving to good will.
Obviously this doesn’t apply to every scenario but I do know a few girls that just will not accept their new size and the consequences can be scary!
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