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Eff Em Friday
Slim Jackson
Eff the level of stress I’ve endured over the last few weeks. My jaw has been clenched (pause) and I had back spasms (pause again) this past weekend because of it all.
Eff Seattle for leaving Boston ya bastard! Oh wait, I’m…well, I’ll talk more about that on my return post on Thursday. He’s not the only one with good news around here!
Eff the fact that I was able to bring 50-75 lbs of clothing and shoes to goodwill from my place. I’m by no means a man whore hoarder, but there are some things it just took me years to get rid of for multiple reasons. Some items were sentimental while others have moved with me from place to place because I’ve never unpacked ‘em.
Eff the most recent episode of Lost. I almost nearly kinda sorta had a tear form in my eye. The writers of that show are truly genius…just like us.
Eff how hectic the next 30 days will be for me. There are so many things I should be looking forward to, but I don’t have time to stop and appreciate because of everything that’s going on. I’m thankful to be here though.
Eff the fact I’ve gotten slightly out of shape. Not sloppy, but out of shape. My 8 pack is down to 6 and Old Spice threatened to revoke our deal.
Siiiiighhhhh…
Miss Jenkins
Nothing to eff this week. Tomorrow (Saturday) is my birthday and my brother graduates from college on Sunday. God is good. Have a great effin’ weekend!
Seattle Washington
Congrats to your brother and homie we’re going to effin celebrate this weekend. Regardless of that restraining order. Let’s get it!
Eff the work I have to do before I bounce. I’m checked out. You know I’m checked out, let’s just stop pretending. Why don’t you meet me at the bar for a drink?
Eff all the packing. Goodwill is going to get a large donation this week and I’m already on Craigslist looking to sell a few items. I’m looking to travel light. Actually, does anyone need a loveseat? Better yet, does anyone want to help me move a few boxes… And a bed?
The Honorable, Rather Articulate and Handsome Award Winning RightCoastLexSteele, LLC
Eff Ms. Jenkins’ birthday. I hope you find another gray hair tomorrow.
Eff neighbors that have bad ass kids. Why does your child think it’s OK to rub cocoa butter lotion on the side mirror my car and run all through my yard? Y’all got me feeling like Ike Turner tryin’ to figure out what the f*ck I’ma do with all these kids…and they not even mine! But I’m guessing you don’t know who their daddy is either…
Eff Ray J and Brandy. Brandy, you can’t rap. Ray J, you’re not as nice as you think are, son. And your family isn’t the Jackson 5. You.suck.
Eff David Paterson for threatening to shut down NY State government. Look homie, I don’t care what you do with the state, but don’t make me have to come see you for my bread. You better send them troopers that was coppin’ you trees to come count my money out to me CASH homie. Actually…just tell them to bring the trees. Yahtzee!!
Eff the haters. Can you see me now? Here…put these sunglasses on…that might help. B*tches.
Effin’ Sideways,
The 3 Ways Crew
RSS & Twitter
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Happy Birthday, Miss Jenkins!!!!
I’m with Slim on effing Lost.
“Eff Ray J and Brandy. Brandy, you can’t rap. Ray J, you’re not as nice as you think are, son. And your family isn’t the Jackson 5. You.suck.”
Yep, allow me to cosign. I don’t know why the people in Brandy’s life don’t just slap her to stop her from embarrassing herself.
Other than that, I got nothing. Oh, eff that I still need to replace my Ipod.
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Eff finals.
Eff the damned effing curve. I have nightmares about the curve. It ruins my meals. It ruins my workouts. I swear, the curve is giving me an ulcer. Eff it.
Eff packing during finals.
And eff me for going back to school.
Eff purpose, wanting to do something more with my life, and wanting to get the peice of paper necessary to do it. Sigh.
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Eff feeling like a GHOST!
Eff not being able to share the thoughts on your mind w/your closest friends and family for fear they’ll look at you like you’re crazy.
Eff the Machine!
Eff the sleeping pills!
Eff the Rain coming this weekend!
Double Eff Gov. Paterson for trying to shut down NY State. I know you’re blind but lets not act def and dumb as well!
Eff my emotions(what the f*cc is this $#!t about?)
Eff BIATCHars nuccas who don’t take care of the seeds they bring in the world.
Eff having a job and still being broke.
Eff the economy.
Eff the Jazz.
Eff Lebron’s Elbow.
Eff Jamarcus Russell’s lazy ars.
Eff LT! DAMN IT MAN! DAMN IT! (I hope and pray that isn’t true b/c then I might not be able to like you any longer)
AND EFF YOU AND YOUR UNBORN SEEDLINGS SEEDS FOR EVEN HAVING A FRACTION OF A THOUGHT ABOUT EFFING ME!
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Miss Jenkins Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 8:30 am
Double Eff Gov. Paterson for trying to shut down NY State. I know you’re blind but lets not act def and dumb as well!
LOL!
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Eff Al Davis for waiting so long to cut JaMarcus.
Eff Lawrence Taylor’s demon’s. A 15 yr old hooker. REALLY?!?!
Eff the NBA for making the playoffs last for six months.
Eff the job market… again and again!
Eff my inner thoughts for making me question where my life is when I’m about to turn 31 in a few weeks.
Eff this humidity. It’s only May 7th and Charleston feels like Saigon.
Y’all have a good weekend and Happy Mother’s Day to any Moms on the site.
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Nick_L_Odeon Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 8:37 am
i went through the same thing when i turned 31.. i’m about to turn 32, i can’t wait for the mental f*ckery to commence..
i’m in Florida.. we’re known for humidity.. this ish is NO joke.. and GUESS whose car decided to not have a/c!?
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effin happy birthday Ms Jenkins.. please know that if you’re turning 20-anything, i’m jealous.. so eff me too!!
eff being out of work for a third week..
eff my former boss for not cutting my last check.. so i can’t take the obligatory “out of work vacation” to NY that i was planning..
eff my computer for coming back.. now the b*tch has laryngitis.. i NEED my sound!! i don’t watch youtube for the mime shows!
eff the idiot at the gym for circling me like a buzzard yesterday.. EFFIN SPEAK!! (then when he did speak) “SPEAK ENGLISH! and stop ruining my sets!!
eff my body clock for not lettingme stay up late nights.. that’s when i write!! WTF!?!? i gotta get my writing done..
eff this dude that wants to plan a lunch get together by EMAIL! i’m thinking it’s too hot to go anywhere at lunch time anyway! i’ll stay in my cool house and eat a turkey sandwich..
eff INS- you’re on September.. get to november already!! i’ve been held back for TOO LONG.. the MINUTE it comes through, i’m moving.. then all the people that live in NY and me gonna have a party!!! (Seattle, this means you too!!)
that might be it.. i wanna say eff mother’s day for coming so early.. i’m outta work, i hope she don’t expect much.. why the hell is it so early this year?!
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Seattle Washington Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 11:06 am
Let me know Nick! I’m in there like swimwear.
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Nick_L_Odeon Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 11:26 am
aww.. thank you sweetie.. you KNOW i’m gonna let you know!! shucks, the whole world will know!!
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Co-sign on effing finals
Eff jetlag.
Eff not being able to stay in touch with the boys from Canada.
Eff stress almost making me forget why I am doing all this
Eff not having a ‘stress reliever’
Eff not getting my butt to bed at a decent hour or worked out in a week
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Not too much effin to go around…
I would say eff job searchin only cause im ready to BOUNCE and need deliverance.. we’ll see.
Eff weekends that speed by. I’d like to stop n smell the roses yakno?
PEACE
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Have a great effin birthday Tiff!!
Eff being tired… I took two days off this job to go work a job in NYC on Monday and DAMN am I tired. I love the thrill of event work, the anxiety before the event, the rush of adrenaline when all hell breaks loose, and the late night dirt dishing after the lights go down and all the celebs have emptied the venue. But what I don’t love is standing up for 12hrs straight in stilettos and having to jump back to the normal 9-5 grind the next day.
I want the next event I work to be a celebrity pajama (Seattle it’s pachama in ATLien) party on a Friday so I can wear fuzzy slippers all night and then have the whole weekend to recover.
Eff my temp agency… I turned in yet another set of tax forms MONTHS AGO!!!(how hard is it to remember tax me in the same state as my effin address on all the over forms?!?! Who said… no, let’s tax her using the address on her resume, despite the fact that it’s not on any of the other paper work). Also what is the hold up w/ my direct deposit. How you gonna say I gave you the wrong routing number when I gave you a form they printed from the computer at the damn bank?!?!? BASTARDS!
Eff my sister and her Mother’s Day foolishness… how you gonna ask us all to participate in activity that cost money, then ask go to dinner at an expensive ass restaurant and have the nerve to be looking for a gift too? You better take this Hallmark Card and like it! o_O
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Seattle Washington Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 11:07 am
I’m finna add “pachama” to my log of ATLien slang.
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Eff the fact that I just spent alot of money this month. I’m poor.
Eff the fact that I’m nervous if my mom and grandmom are going to accept the home made cards that I made them.
Eff Gov Patterson and Mayor Bloomberg. Yes I work in the government of the City of NY. However, I work for a federally funded city agency which means “CUT THE CHECK!!”
Eff that it takes this long for brands to heal.
Eff yo couch!!!
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Eff Lost. Eff Smoke Monsters and how cheesy its attacks are. Eff Flash Sideways John Locke. Eff Jack accepting his destiny.
Eff expensive vacations. I better make this money back in vegas.
Eff Bday parties. Must everyone celebrate every year!
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Guns & Butter Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 10:44 am
-i have no choice but to make this gwapworth back in vegas.
-forreal on the birthday parties, tho. like.. c’mon son.. a year aint even that long homie. i don’t feel like being dragged out to some bullshit club i wouldn’t go to otherwise for your birthday..
-Smoke Locke too devious. Eff him.
-Sawyer shoulda listened to Jack. Eff him.
-Kate shouldn’t even feel some kinda guilt for raising Aaron. Claire was NOWHERE to be found, baby on the beach crying and shit. That’s bad parenting. If I was Kate I woulda gone back to the island to yap some babysitting payments from Claire. But i don’t like Kate, so eff her.
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CHeeKZ Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 3:17 pm
hwo do you not like Kate?
She always has some sexy piece of dirt on her face. Just want to lick it off… and her abs.
She is like a normal person verson of Pink
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Wu Young Agent of M.E. Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 3:34 pm
Kate is on my 2520 list. She may very well kill you but oh well.
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Wu Young Agent of M.E. Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 11:56 am
The smoke monster is a b***h. Eff him for killing Eco, Sun and Jin and everybody eles.
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CHeeKZ Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 3:20 pm
I see where they are going with the show now.. like the whole point was for people to die.
Which is funny.. b/c I am 100% sure that they orginally started killing off characters b/c the cast was too big.
When they came up with the show.. they had no ending. So they are just trying to make everything fit now.
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..on LOST (SPOILER ALERT!!! if you haven’t seen the show, and desire to, DONT READ)
eff sawyer for not listening to jack aka jacob 2.0. bodied my favorite korean power couple. i’d like to take this moment to highlight Jin and Sun’s gangsta:
Remember Jin’s jumping spin kick on Mikhail in the middle of the jungle? One of my favorite moments on the show. he was also an every day korean corporate goon. gotta love that.
Sun was thugged out too. She slapped Michael Juliet, and Sawyer, yapped her pop’s company, and was 2 seconds from clappin’ at Ben Linus. They will be missed.
eff the Lost writers for killing them. they shoulda killed kate. i don’t like kate.. she’s annoying.
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Wu Young Agent of M.E. Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 11:58 am
Eff Sawyer for not letting go of his ish and just being a good guy for once. Jake is on your side hoss.
I liked Kate so much better when she was a badass and not a girl. What a waste.
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Eff the rain and cold weather today.
Eff Grey’s Anatomy for making me laugh then making me gag at the fat man.
Eff car shopping. I’ve changed my mind about 10 times in the last 2 months about what car I wanna get. A couple weeks ago it was the Altima, this week it’s the Zephyr. I need to make a concrete decision.
Eff Nightmare on Elm Street, it was just alright. And I really didn’t like the new Freddy. I wasn’t buying it.
Eff sweating in awkward places. I definitely left the gym yesterday and was like, how did THAT happen. lol
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Nick_L_Odeon Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 11:23 am
first of all.. WHERE THE H*LL do you live that you got rain AND cold weather.. i’ll trade you!! it’s hotter than a dirtbike out this way!!
and 2nd.. I wasn’t buying the new freddie either.. i was like, “why does he talk like he had a stroke.. that’s not good..” BUT you have to admit, some of those scenes were jump-worthy..
and 3rd.. i have to be careful about the color tights i wear to the gym too.. i HATE sweating and everyone being able to know where it’s happening!!
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olivya23 Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 12:11 pm
Chicago
The end of the movie was what really got me. But with Freddy all I could think about was why is he so small and that he played the bad boy in Bad News Bears.
I don’t know what happened yesterday but my black tights were not cutting it. It was really unacceptable and a little embarrassing.
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Eff the grad student that turned declined the position she was hired for in February causing me to have to search for another qualified Resident Director to work for me for the summer
Eff all my “close” sorors and friends that didnt holla at me for my crossing anniversary. Wait till I see you on the street
Eff the Governor of Arizona
Eff Elisabeth Hasselbeck for her ridiculous comments regarding Erin Andrews
Eff my older brother who tried to have a conversation with me this week. Like we talk..phhst go stand under a cliff and let the coyote drop an ACME anvil on you
Have a great mother’s day everyone
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CHeeKZ Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 3:26 pm
Elisabeth Hasselbeck is everything that is wrong with Christianity.
Eff her and Eff her stupid opinions. Who can’t tell the difference between a stalker and a tight dress?
BTW Erin Andrews is a smedium newcaster. Pam Oliver and Bonny Bernstein could get the pipe years before she could.
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Wu Young Agent of M.E. Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 3:32 pm
Two words: Reischea Candidate.
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Happy Birthday Ms. Jenkins!!
Not to much to eff this week it’s been a pretty good week.
Eff these undergrads. I’m really going to need for you all to look up and follow the traffic directions. Stop darting in front of my car. Would it be wrong to nudge them with my car?
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Happy Day of Birth Miss Jenkins and Congrats to your bro. Nothing to eff this week. Have a great weekend all!
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Surprisingly I don’t have much to eff either.
Eff my job hunting that has changed from ‘oh let’s casually take a look around and see what’s out there’ to ‘I have to get out of this backasswards place immediately’ in about 0.5 seconds. I haven’t even been where I’m at for six months and I’ve already outgrown it.
Eff when I blog about something that makes perfect sense to me and everyone disagrees.
Eff this advertising conference I’m heading to now. If I don’t learn something I’m asking for my money back.
Happy effing birthday Miss Jenkins!
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Nick_L_Odeon Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 11:25 am
i usually am writing about something that causes people to look at me like o_O.. i’m looking like, “i’m not in the matrix, right?! it makes perfect sense!!”
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eff technology! when it works, its great! but when it doesnt?? EFFFFFF!
eff not being on the Slope reliving my drunken Slope Day experiences. Drake is performing and I’m here at my desk collecting a paycheck…
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RightCoastLexSteele Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 1:22 pm
Man…f*ck Drake…I have half a mind to drive out there and throw his no ablum havin ass in one of them gorges.
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CHeeKZ Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 3:51 pm
Best Slope Day is still ’05 (05!)
The Game. Snoop. The Starting Line. And1 Basketball. DJ Enuff.
Years in the making.. shout out to Guns&Butta
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Eff that I am always in the wrong city at the wrong time – so I can’t celebrate MissJenkins big 25th birthday with her
Happy Birthday! and have a great one! but be safe!!
eff the pollen and the heat that makes the A what it is. I am sick of breaking out in hives everytime I touch my car door.
eff my soon to be former new boo – you are psycho stalkerish and I refuse to ignore the red flags and end up on Snapped, you aint that fine.
eff my friend for thinking I should wear a coral dress at her wedding…coral really? now I think I will have the bird flu next March
eff applebee’s and the $2 long island iced teas – you feel like you can get as many as you want until the next morning
eff LOST I finally caught up and watched like 6 episodes in a row and you kill folks as soon as they reunite?! and its folks I like? Why not CoooCooo for CoCo Puffs Claire or Mr. I take all of Jack’s sloppy seconds Sawyer or even the Queen of Stupid Kate? This hurts almost as much as when they killed Charlie
eff my friend for getting upset with me for asking her about contact info for the job she got fired from….i mean this economy is a beast can you really be upset?
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Guns & Butter Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 12:25 pm
I wanted to fight the tv when charlie died.
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Slim Jackson Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 1:47 pm
lol at fighting the tv. Charlie dying didn’t really do anything to me. I was like oh okay, so long Charlie.
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InsomniaPoet Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 2:43 pm
Shame on you! That was the saddest day ever! How can you not cry when a hobbit dies?!
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Wu Young Agent of M.E. Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 3:30 pm
He should have kept his a** in Middle Earth and away from the heroin. If he didn’t die on the island he would have become a hobbit version of Bubbles from the Wire.
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CHeeKZ Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 4:00 pm
We knew Charlie was going to die. We knew how he was going to die. We knew he volunteered to die…
Tuesday was a complete surprise. No one knew it was going to be that serious. Some one needs to get a fire extinguisher and put out that smoke monster.
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Eff this rain. And not just any rain. Vindictive, evil rain. When I was walking to work, it just sprinkled a bit for the majority of my trip, so I just put on my hood instead of going through the trouble of taking out the umbrella. I stopped to get breakfast near the building where I work and it started POURING raining. I was like 2 minutes away from the building and got soaked. Eff a raindrop.
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Cheekie Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 12:14 pm
ETA: Oh, and happy birfday, MissJenkins!
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I don’t have any Effs this week. I am blessed and highly favored!! Yesterday was a fantastic day to turn 28, and I am blessed to have the best family and the best friends in the world.
It’s a beautiful day, and I have the day off!! YAY!!
Happy Birthday Miss Jenkins!!
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hmm.
eff pandora radio for playing “jump” by kris kross on my “naughty by nature radio”…
eff me for listening and enjoying.
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CHeeKZ Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 3:13 pm
see how good commerical radio use to be…
The good old fashion Boom Bap drums with that west coast inspired syth organ.
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Eff LOST for losin me a long damn time ago
Eff all of you who understand wtf is even going on on that damned show
Eff Target/Walmart/Blockbuster & the money I’ll spend at any one of them when the final season comes out on video
Eff the fact that I’ll have nobody to talk too about it when I finally do get un-Lost
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