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Eff Em Friday
Miss Jenkins
Eff this loud ass street work that is going on outside of my apartment right now. Yall gotta do that at 10pm? Really? Got my TV up all loud like I only have one good ear.
Eff my tiny half-pint stove. And eff the pot that was on the right back burner. And eff the fact that the handle was facing in while I was cooking. Eff me for not realizing it until I picked up the pot and it burned the hell out of my hand. My right hand.
Eff the man at CVS who sent me to 2 wrong aisles in search of pure aloe vera. Dummy. Learn your store.
Eff allergies.
Eff Slim and Seattle for being slackers.
And eff RCLS’s face for making me want to punch a kitten.
Seattle Washington
Eff you and your cousin too Sowhatiff.
Eff pretty chicks who smoke. As weird as it sounds, it’s such a damn let down to see you pull out and suck on that stick.
Eff that I don’t have much to eff because it’s summer in the city. I want to get out there and enjoy these last few weeks.
Slim Jackson
Eff the funk I been in for the last 3 weeks.
Eff the events that led to said funk.
Eff people who put their nose in my business without solicitation of their opinion. If the business was in the crack of my ass, would you put your nose there?
Eff lies and deceit. Don’t get yourself Roger Clemens’d and/or verbally murked in a public setting.
Eff the fact that I have 6 posts written that will never see the light of day.
Eff cowardice.
Eff those who have been waiting for me to post something reckless so they can run-tell-dat and create a firestorm. You’ll get your wish soon enough.
Guess who’s effin’ back?!
Have a great effing weekend,
&
RSS & Twitter
-
Oooh been patiently waiting…
ahem…
Eff my so called “friends” for not helping me this past weekend to move. How you gon tell me that you’ll help me once I’m at my new place cuz it’s too far? You mean you expect me to carry my living room, bed set, and entertainment center all on my own down from the 3rd floor like I’m spider man? Eff outta here!
Eff me wanting and not getting what I want.
Eff the old boy toy for trying to put a front with his fam and me effing his lil bubble and putting him on blast. Yeah effer… I don’t play that. I’m either it or I’m not. Simple as that.
That is all for today.
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Eff how long it took me to find school supplies between THREE websites! And Eff how much i spent on supplies. When i have children, I swear my bank account will cry real tears!
Eff Staples & their expensive a$$ delivery rate! They better be sending it VIA UPS for almost $10!
Eff how much it will cost me to commute this semester, i definitely did the math & it will cost over $700 because i have to go from Penn station…speaking of which…
Eff the fact that my job more than likely will make me late for class…i’ll be getting the worst seats…#FML
Eff not knowing what to wear to RHOyalfest…i may just wear my fuchsia maxi dress and worry about sorors saying something afterward…i don’t want to be like everyone else and wear a sorority t-shirt…i like to stand out…#dontjudgeme!
Eff the fact that my mom is going to AL & she’ll get to see my chapter sorors but I won’t! I miss them…#emoeffem
Eff how lazy I’m being…i simply don’t feel like going where I need to to get some toiletries I will need soon!
Where the Eff is the other Three Ways Crew’s effs?
I think that is about it!
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 12:55 am
Also, Eff my laptop for spazzing out because i need a new video card! I need it to be effin patient!
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As weird as it sounds, it’s such a damn let down to see you pull out and suck on that stick.
^^^#PAUSE Seattle, LOL
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 2:35 am
even though you said it was a disappointment, all i thought was #pause at the “suck on that stick”
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Seriously eff all of my so called friends… just got stood up by almost all of them… SMH what kind of “friends” are you?
Time to meet new people. Im done with them.
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 3:25 am
sorry i’m not where near you (to my knowledge) or else i would’ve totally been willing to help you…i hate when people flake on me so i can only imagine how you feel.
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Lola Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:14 am
I HATE flaky people. I just cant deal. And these are my supposed friends too! Like really Jesus?! Nah. Im done with them. Even if it means not having friends for a while thats fine. Im just so disappointed. SMH. Oh well lets keep it moving. #OnToTheNextOne
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 2:55 pm
I understand…sometimes, it is at the worst times that you are shown who is not really there for you…i hope you find folks that are willing to be there for you soon…if ever you’re in NY, you’ve got a friend in me! *cues the song from Toy Story*
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Lola Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 3:42 pm
Awe L!!! Thank you hon! I’ll make sure that when I stop up there we hang out!
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L.Dejean Reply:
August 21st, 2010 at 4:05 am
No problem! Streetz and Peyso know where to find me! =0)
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I have another:
Eff the fact that i didn’t see that Sane had mentioned me in the whole wrestling convo until just now when i did a test to see how far back the wireless picked up on echofon….she wouldn’t have seen my responses but it would’ve been nice to know i was included! lol!
Eff Slim for not telling me that I was being included in this convo since he clearly has the power to tell me so! lol
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SaneN85 Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:26 am
Are you one of those people who feel the urge to block their account?
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CHeeKZ Money Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 12:52 pm
I swear I think I am missing out on ish by not being on twitter?
Y’all wrestle now? WTF?
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 2:54 pm
nope, Slim tweeted about the Rick Flair and missing the old WWF…we responded…i used to be a fan of the WWF!
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 2:53 pm
Yea, i have a private account because of the profession in which i would be entering…if you look back at the tweets about wrestling, you will know which is me! lol
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omg
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Eff that my so called friend flaked out on me and now I have to play mas by myself at the labor day parade.
Eff that my “friend” is taunting and just won’t come already.
Eff that I am at work with absolutely nothing to do and I have to front like I am working.
Eff guys!! You all are getting on my nerves and yes I am being too general. So what!!
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BP Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:23 am
“Eff that I am at work with absolutely nothing to do and I have to front like I am working.”
Cosign! EFFFF THAT!
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Eff my pillow for making my neck hurt.
Eff sleeping wrong on my pillow.
Eff working out and then not stretching after which i’m sure is a HUGE contribution to my ACHING NECK PAIN.
Eff your neck and your back, lick my B@11$ & my $@ck! (shout out to Khia and Memph Bleek)
Eff it being a slow ars work week and being stuck at work.
Eff the mechanics for charging me 3x the amount of the part for labor and Eff them for always finding something new wrong w/my car when I just bring it in for an oil change. Fo’ real though!?
Eff me not having my private jet yet. I’d be in NYC in no time.
Eff not being a billionaire. I wanna be a billionaire so friggin bad, so I can buy all of the things I never had, and all the things you ever wanted. Yes, that includes you and you too!
Eff Seattle and BBW for jumping out of a plane w/out me last weekend. Couldn’t wait one weekend could yah? SMh!
Eff Queens! (shout out to Seattle who by the way owes me a drink, Jack on the rocks anyone?)
Eff ex’s whom I can’t seem to escape. Its not my fault I mess w/only hotness…
Eff the folks opposing the mosque in downtown nyc. First of all, its not a mosque, its a cultural center. Second, its two blocks away not on the same street. Third, there’s another mosque 4 blocks away and nobody is complaining about that one which was there before the WTC. Lastly, there are a bunch of strip clubs, xxx video stores and other raunchy stuff right around the corner but nobody says anything about those ever. Show’s where our values as a country lie hey. Smh…
Eff Off!
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Eff…
I don’t have anything to eff, I just wanted to use the MaN.I.A.c handle. lol. It’s been a good week. Have a blessed weekend, folks!!
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She's a MaN.I.A.c, maN.I.A.c on the floor. And she's dancing like she never danced before... Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 9:31 am
No, my smiley is all wrong. Let’s try this…
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Miss Jenkins Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 9:33 am
lol. its still wrong. Its okay. Have a great weekend boo!
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She's a MaN.I.A.c, maN.I.A.c on the floor. And she's dancing like she never danced before... Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:32 am
LOL! I was trying to blow a kiss. And failed twice, so now it looks like Smiley wants to fight. lol. smh…
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SaneN85 Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:27 am
Awww. Your handle brings me memories *soap opera fade to flashbacks*
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“Eff pretty chicks who smoke. As weird as it sounds, it’s such a damn let down to see you pull out and suck on that stick.”
Eff me for being that chick.
Eff ungentlemanly dudes. How are you gonna take me out and then let me walk home alone in the middle of the night and not even check to see if I make it home okay. I live in the hood Negro!
Eff thirsty chicks. We’re not talking about them anymore but I’m still effing them with every breath in my body.
Eff me for occasionally being epically irresponsible. When ish blows up in my face I can’t even complain about it because it’s my fault.
Eff CHeeKZ!
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Miss Jenkins Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:32 am
“Eff thirsty chicks. We’re not talking about them anymore but I’m still effing them with every breath in my body.”
Pause. But me too. Lawd have mercy.
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CHeeKZ Money Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 1:03 pm
Eff CHeeKZ!
co-sign.
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Hmmm….what to eff…what to eff
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Let the effing commence!!
Eff that after being single 2+ years I have clearly forgotten the steps to booking a dude.
Eff that I met the MOST perfect man in Las Vegas…
Eff me for being too concerned about societal rules & just having met him that I couldn’t bring myself to spend more time w/ him on our last night.
Eff ‘us’ for being too white-boy wasted (literally lol) to remember that we hadn’t exchanged contact info.
Eff that the Mandalay Bay hotel operator was a b!tch and refused to connect me to his room at 5:03 in the morning just b/c I didn’t have his last name. Whomps. -_-
Eff that people never check their hotel voicemail so I’m pretty sure he didn’t get my message.
Eff that I didn’t give him enough info about me to look me up.
Eff the Venice Beach Streetball league for their underdeveloped team rosters.
Eff fate for playing the movie ‘Something New’ on Oxygen the next night as I was tryna put my memories of him behind me.
Eff my friend for not taking that model looking dude up on whatever he was offering. He was FINE. & he likes or shall I say prefers plus-sized women… she better WERK.
Eff that all the cool a$$ men I met on vacation were from L.A.
Eff East Coast dudes, I’m moving west.
Last but not least, eff being unofficially official that sh!t is for the b-i-r-d-s & all grey area relationships are completely washed from my system.
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Slim Jackson Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:04 am
What exactly do you mean by booking a dude? Like for “sessions”? lol.
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S0_Flyy Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:08 am
Lmao. I forget that you are from NY sometimes Slim. Uhm, no not sessions (whatever those are… they don’t sound too wholesome). Booking someone is DC vernacular for getting their contact info after you make it known you are interested.
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Slim Jackson Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:25 am
Oh, I see. I learned something new. I really thought you meant you didn’t know how to line up romps. I was making the curious puppy dog head tilted face. lol.
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LaBakir Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:08 am
@ So FLYY
This sh*t right hurr—->Last but not least, eff being unofficially official that sh!t is for the b-i-r-d-s & all grey area relationships are completely washed from my system.
is gospel! I can’t take that “we’re more than friends, but we’re not together” crap.
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S0_Flyy Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:11 am
Let the chuuuuurch say ‘Amen’. I can’t do it anymore. I’ve got a ‘friend’ coming from out of town this weekend who does everything but profess his love & commit. I’m not the type to force it so it seems like I always get these ‘i don’t want to be committed to you but i don’t want you to mess w/ nobody else’ type “relationships.”
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LaBakir Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:17 am
I can dig it. I mean, you want the dude to want a relationship too. And nobody wants to be the pressuring, nagging type. If a dude gives me “signals” that his favorite color is “grey”, that’s my green light to exit stage left.
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Lola Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:53 am
Ish dont get me started on this right here. I just cut him off completely.
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S0_Flyy Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:26 am
Yea I need to start doing that. But now that I’m in said “grey” relationship I’m not sure I know how to just cut him off w/o having a ‘good enough’ reason (i.e., a new man).
Suggestions?
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LaBakir Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:35 am
Well, do you want a relationship?
If that would add to your “happiness” and he doesn’t want to get on board, what other reason would you need(to cut him off)?
And I don’t know your history with him and all the details, so that’s a very generic answer/question…but something I’ve asked myself at times. I also acknowledge it’s waaaay easier to say than to carry out,lol
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CHeeKZ Money Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 1:13 pm
0_0
WOW! That is alot to shallow (#TIWSS). You make me miss Vegas… except your whole falling in love with a 2520 thing. But hey everyone has their own version of the Hangover.
Love Mandalay Bay
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S0_Flyy Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 1:32 pm
Lmao @ falling in love w/ a 2520. The weird part about that is my fam always said I’d be the one to end up w/ a 2520. I think that’s just b/c they (my cousins who are my age) are stereotypical blacks. LOL. I love everything ‘black’ but I do enjoy somethings that are out of the box.
I never saw myself w/ a 2520 though until this whole Angry Black Woman/Shortage of Black Men internet fiasco. My dad sent me an article back in my freshman year of undergrad talmbout I may want to start expanding my options.
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 3:00 pm
wow…my dad wouldn’t ever send me such an article…he doesn’t want me with a 2520 & told me so when i was younger…i’m sure he knows that i more than likely wouldn’t end up with a Haitian man (no offense Streetz, i still love you, lol)
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Eff that i got the money to get these books.
Eff that it gets real this weekend!
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She's a MaN.I.A.c, maN.I.A.c on the floor. And she's dancing like she never danced before... Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:35 am
When do classes start?
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Please Excuse Your Significant Other Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:35 am
Monday
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Miss Jenkins Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:43 am
I hope you’re in the library. Go read.
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N.I.A. naturally Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:24 am
What she said!! And Half.com will become your friend, if it isn’t already.
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Please Excuse Your Significant Other Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:37 pm
my joints aint even on there. My bookstore was cheaper for a few of them though
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 3:01 pm
good luck! I just had to calculate how much it will cost me in Commuting! I have no idea what books will cost cause NONE of my professors have sent a syllabus…Eff waiting till the last minute on their part!
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S0_Flyy Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:27 am
Oh… and if you can use ebooks Coursesmart is a lifesaver.
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Capricorn Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 12:22 pm
So is this the last eff I will give to Peyso until Midterms?
EFF Peyso right in the library!!
*goes back to thinking of things to EFF*
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Please Excuse Your Significant Other Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:31 pm
naw, i make time for effs
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Eff the MF United States Postal Service. This b*tch STILL didnt call me back! I kNOW that this carrier who “delivered” my shyt didn’t call out for the entire week!!! Its time to escalate the situation. Word.
Eff UPS too. Effin Iotas want to leave packages outside like thats cool? IM finna go off!!
Eff Shaun T. Insanity Month 2 is absolutely estupido loco (c) Christian Grant-Fields. My will will not let me succumb (pause?) to defeat! Six pack shakur status here I come!
Eff me for falling asleep and dreaming that I put up the Rantings of a SBM at 1am…. when I actually didn’t. SMH. That sleep was good tho…
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Ladycakes Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 1:30 pm
Eff UPS too. Effin Iotas want to leave packages outside like thats cool? IM finna go off!!
Po Iotas forever getting clowned.
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L. Dejean Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 3:10 pm
Eff your low blows…because they are funny! lol
And Eff you for posting the rantings so late so now i’m one of those extremely late comments!
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I knew there was something I wanted to eff
Eff people who don’t keep their word. If you say you’re going to do something, I expect you to do it. Plain and simple. I don’t understand what’s so hard about that.
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Lola Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:57 am
Amen!!!!!
I have problems with people who cant keep their word. I mean prob-blems!!!! Be a man (woman) of your word. Make it have some value and meaning if not, Ima drop you cuz theres nothing there of value.
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LaBakir Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:01 am
EXACTLY!!!! It’s like, don’t do me any favors…trying to gas me with empty promises. Saying what you THINK I want to hear. It’s uncalled for and b/c of it, you just lost a good friend.
*AOL voice* Good bye
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Lola Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:08 am
Yup!!! Buh-bye!!!
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My first post ever online.
Eff this economy for not providing me with a job after I graduated.
Eff this student job kicking me to the curb because I’m no longer a student.
Eff this guy who one day its great the next he’s MIA.
Eff me being at work on my day off because I missed a day this week.
Eff my blackberry for acting like its on crack & not allowing me to type “a”
Eff people who twatch… can I tweet without you asking me about everything I said please?!!! Get a life & stop your follower game up!
That felt good!
Have a great Friday!
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MissCollegeAlum Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 10:59 am
meant *step your follower game up
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Slim Jackson Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:00 am
Welcome and thanks for letting us be your first in a completely clean way. Make sure you c’mon back now ya here?
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MissCollegeAlum Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 11:02 am
Will do.
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Eff law school, all it stands for, and it’s couch.
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Effff my coworker for coughing all over the community kitchen with her sore throat.
Efff my sore throat.
Effff my S/O asking me to watch his dog for him tomorrow. I don’t like your dog remember and I have stuff to do!!!
Eff my job rightaboutnow. Is it 4 yet?
Eff my gym eye candy for almost making me fall of the treadmill and pull a muscle on the leg press. Stop walkng around flaunting your fineness, thanks.
Eff it not being 4 yet.
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Eff that classes start in 10 days. I forgot all about that ish.
Eff that I’m gon need big book money. (Thanks for the reminder Peyso)
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Eff the heffa who didn’t know how to play softball well enough to get the eff off of third base when there was less than a 1% she was gonna get me out.
Eff me for reacting to slowly to her large butt faking getting off the base.
Eff this stupid ass “air cast”. My ankle hurts without you, but you are sooooo unbearably unconfortable.
Eff that I will likely not be able to play in the tournament next weekend, and eff that I am now able to say it out loud, which makes it even more real.
Eff that I have an interview this afternoon (one that I’m sure I won’t get), but am still unable to wear shoes. I have to figure out a way around this.
Eff Slim and eff Peyso!
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Eff the fact that my friend never told me his dog knew how to open doors. You know how much damage a Boxer/Pit Bull can cause. I just replaced that carpet grr!!!
Eff the fact that I suckered yet again into helping out with the next family reunion. Momdukes is slick as owl sh*t smh.
Eff having to be responsible. How come I can’t do hoosh*t with my friends? It’s not fair I tell ya.
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Ladycakes Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 12:15 pm
and eff the fact that this damn dog pissed in MY FAVORITE SHOE. -_-. I’m billing my friend when he gets back.
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Eff Swizz Beats and Kanye West….that Power remix is effing retarded!!! I can’t!!! Swizz is one of the illest production wise…gotdamn. Ye’s flow…I’m at a lost for words.
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CHeeKZ Money Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 1:19 pm
Co-sign.
Hov is coming off too. (#thatiswhatBeyoncesaid) I thought Jay was going to get a little revenge for what Ye did on Run this Town. Than Swizz got really 90′s and Kanye closed the show.
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LaBakir Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 1:22 pm
Lol!
Yeah Swizz is a beast. That beat change for the perfect alley-oop for Ye.
I’ll seriously pass out if Ye makes a guest appearance at the Yankee Stadium concert and him and Jay perform this.
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CHeeKZ Money Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 2:19 pm
Eff you if you got tickets.
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LaBakir Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 2:32 pm
Eff me then Cheekz…b/c I’m in the houuuuussse #RocBoys
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BLaCk Bruce WaYnE Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 4:07 pm
double co-sign
I thought the Kanye tweets about Swizz Beatz were a little much but after listening to that Power Remix….Swizz is a BEAST!
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LaBakir Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 4:14 pm
Yeah man…I’ve always respected Swizz. He’s been in the game a minute and is pretty darn good.
But this sh*t right here…ninja this sh*t right here is in a league all by itself! LOL!
*goes to listen again*
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Eff these cases b/c they won’t process themselves.
Eff budgets. Grrr…
Eff the end of summer for MiniMe, she starts school on MONDAY??! Where did the summer go?
Eff the summer for speeding by.
Eff this weekend because I have a movie tonight, a familial outing tomorrow afternoon, party and drinks (and more?) tomorrow night and the annual crab feats sunday after church. And FDOS on Monday. yay me!! *wall slide*
Eff the signal in the building, I NEED my Pandora station to stop going out on my likeable songs.
Eff the crush and his muscles. ALL of them. *fans self*
Eff ABC for making me wait until the END of September for my GA and Private Practice fixes.
Eff Russell Edgington and his Talbot urn AND his throw to Tiffany the weather girl. I DIED with laughter!!
Eff Peyso for his scholastic endeavors, which leaves me little time to eff him properly. ;P
Eff these cases again. They keep coming. Pause.
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Good Mourning, good afternoon, good night.. what have you done with your life…
eff this flu/cold that has sidelined me since my birthday..
eff the spazz i had earlier this week.. some people shouldn’t know that they get to you..
eff my mother for giving me the usual birthday check, then telling me not to cash it.. yes mom, i’ll just hold on to it til next year like i did last time.. why even bother..
eff going to bed at 4:30 last night and having to wake up at 7:30
eff how behind i’ve been on my posts.
eff that i should’ve spoken up earlier this week, but lack of confidence in my writing let an opportunity pass me by..
eff not having anywhere to go this weekend..
eff everyone’s couch!
peace and love.. Nick
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I am so frustrated today. SO I have to come back for more….
Eff my throat still hurting.
Eff it still not being 4 yet.
Eff all these meetings I hate sitting in on.
Eff my high moral compass…
Eff me effing my high moral compass. Momtaughtmebetterthanthat.
Eff pretentious a*s people, go somewhere with that.
Eff my top button opening and exposing my cleavage to our district director during our meeting.
Eff fantasizing while in said meeting about tap dancing around our conference table and telling everyone to shupthehellup and not being able to do it.
Efffffffffffffffffffffff!
That felt good.
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Slim Jackson Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 6:20 pm
I guffawed at the tap dancing. I imagined a silhouette dancing on the table with teeth sparkling tellin people to shut the eff up.
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BP Reply:
August 20th, 2010 at 8:05 pm
Ha! I was all Gregory Hines on their ass*s!
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