Eff ‘Em Fridays
It’s that time again folks. It’s the end of the week. We’re happy that it’s here…cuz we were about to be some of the angriest Black people that you know. With that said, we shall vent.
Slim
Eff people that overestimate their level of cool based on the popularity of their blog. Where would some people’s lives be without a keyboard and some web space? I was humble when I had 30 subscribers and I’ll be humble when I have 300 or 3000. Appreciate the people that make you what you are.
Eff my commission-based job. Yeah, I’m sure I’ll be singin’ a different tune when the economy turns around and business is boomin’ again. But for now, eff the extra daily grind to produce the same minimal result! I feel like a f*ckin hamster on a wheel sometimes.
Eff the mosquitoes for goin’ banquet style on my lower legs this past weekend when I fell asleep on a hammock. I’d still take them over sandflies though. No doubt about it.
Seattle
Eff not having a summer vacation. Yeah it’s been several years since I graduated from college and I’m somewhat used to it, but I still get salty when I see high school kids with the whole summer off. I would say eff the kids, but that depending on how you interpret it – it sounds wrong or it just makes me seem like a bad person.
Eff folks who think shit is sweet just because we work together. You slipped up and showed your racist tendencies when we were out drinking. Just because I keep some sort of decorum in the office and are cordial towards you doesn’t mean I want to hang out with you.
Eff my own insatiable appetite for success. I just had the biggest presentation of my short work life, did the damn thing and I’m already looking for the next big job. Sometimes I feel like I’ll never be satisfied. Eff it it’s Friday, enough about work.
Miss Jenkins
Eff today being the last day of my internship. Eff not having the fly 2-hour lunches, the pay checks, and the schwanky corporate lifestyle anymore for now. And eff the economy for making me worried about (not) getting a job after graduation.
Eff not having my summer chocolately glow.
Eff not having really extensive and funny eff ‘ems this week. Work kept me too busy to really think about them.
Oh yeah, eff Maxwell for dropping a CD with 9 tracks. What the eff is that about?
Its the weekend snitches! You know the drill.
Be safe out there in the sheets streets,
The Three Ways Crew
And eff you if you haven’t voted for us for the Black Web Blogs.
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Eff those grave diggers from Chicago’s Burr Oak Cemetery (historically black burial ground) re-selling over 100 grave sites and misplacing bones of families loved ones…
Eff being burried, cremate me!
Eff all the Michael Jackson haters!
Eff Seattle for not providing me w/that new cracc he got!
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Seattle Washington Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 10:39 am
Eff Brookland’s Own for just wanting to eat and not learning how to fish!
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Brookland's OWn Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 11:08 am
Eff Seattle for not feeding me nor comprehending that the location i’m fishing in is toxic and won’ t allow me to eat fish (pause).
O, n Eff QUEENS! (Take dat, take dat…)
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Seattle Washington Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
Eff B.O. here for expecting folks to hold his hand through life. I guess you want me to buy you a fishing rod too?
And eff Brooklyn just off the strength of ^that guy^.
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Effe alarm clocks…. I hate the gut wrenching sound of “WALK DAT WALK” disturbing my blissful slumber.
Effe men who try to holla and then ask are you sure, when u reject them…. Ummm, if I wanted you, wouldn’t I say so in the first place?
Effe going to the doctor and getting probed.
Effe this blazing heat. I hate to sound ungrateful, but I’m ready for fall now.
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Eff that guy who dumped me a year ago because I wouldn’t sleep with him right away. Bumped into him this week, he’s talkin about ‘you are still beautiful’, grinning at me. Yeah, and you are probably still an arse!
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Eff complications, why can’t shit be simple anymore? Why does everything have to come with a ‘but’? 60% off BUT no returns. Full body massages BUT no male masseuses. You’re not my girl BUT we can just pretend.
Eff the rain. Damn monsoon has caused minor flooding and there’s mud everywhere, and the mosquitos are out in full effect. Definitely dropped my Visa in a puddle of water and cow manure. JOY!
Eff Hulu because it doesn’t work in India. I’m missing the best of American television. EFF YOU HULU!
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Eff doing more work for the same pay. As far as jobs go I like mine just fine, but if they ask me to take on one more thing…
Eff this tentative New England summer we’re having. It’s July, I should already hear people complaining about the heat.
Eff hurting my foot while working out; I don’t know quite how it happened, I just hope that my limp is sexy
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Slim Jackson Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 10:01 am
Are you in Boston?
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Tatica Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 10:10 am
Yes, on the waterfront no less and I can’t fully enjoy it.
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Eff being too bz @ work to comment on 3ways (despite having a subscription)
Eff being nice to others only to get the cold shoulder..eff me? No eff you
Eff getting a surprise coffee from a coworker that is not to my specifications, next time save your chump change (2 cream 3 sugars)
Eff workers who speculate that I’m gay because I’m so gawddamn sexy and single (technically) and I don’t feel the need to begin every sentence with “[insert boy name] and I”..try saying what you think to MA FACE…YES DIS FACE HYERE SAH!!!
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Slim Jackson Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 10:02 am
I actually get pretty annoyed with women who always feel the need to mention their man even when I’m not tryna hit on them. It’s like STFU already!
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Eff feeling hungover despite the fact that I don’t remember drinkin’ enough to be hungover
Eff people who haven’t seen the hangover yet. (Who let the dogs out?)
Eff the slice in my golf swing. What the hell do you mean my hands are ahead of my club? And eff fast greens. You just turned my beautiful chip shot from a good on to a 45 foot putt.
Eff Tom Golisano. Seriously, f*ck you dude.
Eff Brookland’s Own for not sparking me up right.now. SPARK ME UP!
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 2:37 pm
“Eff people who haven’t seen the hangover yet. (Who let the dogs out?)”
LMAO. this movie is a classic.
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Oh and eff the adolescent kid that runs around the upstairs apartment. It sounds like she’s doing suicides and I know because I can hear every step of her Flintstone feet. She ensures that I don’t sleep late on the weekends and, sometimes, weekdays.
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Eff that I haven’t been able to get my sunkist Orange radiance on either……
Eff that some feelings about some folks won’t go away….their really useless ya know
Eff the dating scene in the district, double dog eff it…….
Eff that it hasn’t been fabulous FUN summer I’d hoped for arrrgggggghhhhh………..
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well its friday and i’m home (finally) so no eff friday for me son.
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Eff the $700 I had to spend to get my car out of the impound for unpaid parking tickets. Eff you Bloomberg for making money off us drivers!
Eff all the people that dont have enough money to go to Six Flags this weekend, I’m going to have fun while you’re at home complaining.
Eff this 80 degree weather, its f-n July, its supposed to be in the 90s. We had a heat wave in April, can we get another, GEEZUS. Im trying to hit the beach this weekend, and not be cold after getting in the water!
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Chocolate Vixen Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 12:03 pm
Eff AIM having me signed on for 5 days, like I have no life. I really need to figure out, why the hell it keeps saying that.
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eff chicago weather for being 68 with light rain…cuz apparently we don’t deserve to enjoy the real summertime chi experience
eff my roommates for slacking on keeping the apartment clean these past few weeks…if you’re not going to do your part, then you need to be hiring somebody cuz i dont clean up after grown people
eff these old school boos for coming out the woodworks soon as i start liking somebody…tryin to get me all confused
eff the fact that i haven’t decided on a date for my friends wedding, but i have to rsvp by tuesday with my date’s name
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CHazz CHeeKZ Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 4:47 pm
After watching Wedding Crashers and see how…. vunerable women are at weddings. I would volunteer to be your date. I wouldn’t want to see some other guy take advantage of you. You need to be with a man u could trust. Holla @ me Jess: 516 555-ROHPNOL
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miss jess Reply:
July 10th, 2009 at 6:25 pm
Ha! That is soo unacceptable… “Roofies…they should be called floories…or rapies” random Hangover quote
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Eff autotune… I just dont understand why rappers don’t get it. The point of making music is to come up with something new.
Eff the NY Mets. 2nd Highest salary in MLB and you are 4.5 out! Seriously, make a trade. Dump the team and gear up for next year. DO SOMETHING. Omar must go, the man doesn’t understand depth.
Eff anybody who thinks Transformers was a good movie. YOU CAN NOT BE A BIGGER TRANSFORMERS FAN THAN ME and I am telling you that the movie sucked!
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Eff people that don’t return emails or phone calls that deeply impact my life. I’ve been hitting this office for 2 week without a single answer. Inconsiderate bastards!!!
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Eff the fact that my BF and I broke up. And when I asked for my things that I left at his house, he decides to UPS them to me!
Eff the fact that my two cats have random dump and urination sessions in my bath tub!
Eff the fact that I had to be extra rude to some guy driving in his hoop ride who kept insisting on giving me a ride to the train station. Dude, I don’t know you!
Eff the fact that I bought a metrocard in the wrapper, and when I used it on the bus, the machine read, “Insufficient funds!”
Eff the fact that Maxwell’s new CD SUCKS!
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