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Emergency D- in a Glass
Shout out to WithRainbowSprinkles for this one.
There comes a point in ever woman’s life where she is going to need one of these. An E.D.G. Last I remember, it was Jay-Z who talked about it in a verse:
Your boy Young Hov’ catchin feelings
and it’s messin up my dealings cause mami’s not willin
to leave her boyfriend, she call me her toy-friend
Said, “We was just ‘sposed to hook up and have a blast”
She called me her emergency d!*&-in-the-glass
Our male readers might have an issue with the idea of this (See How Many People Have You Slept With?) but I’m sure they wouldn’t mind being on the receiving end of one of these 911 calls.
As someone who generally likes to thronx someone I care about, I resisted the idea of an E.D.G. But when a woman falls on tough times, she should be able to pick up the phone, and get that dose of Vitamin D she needs. I mean, its only fair. The problem: you can’t just have any ol’ dude try and come (pause) to the rescue.
Who can be an E.D.G.?
A man who you are familiar and comfortable with. Someone you have established some sort of relationship (not necessarily romantic) with. He can be someone you have flirted with in past, and may or may not have had sex with before. Some of the pluses of this: the tension between you two is high; this could make the thronxing even more fulfilling. Some of the drawbacks: His D-game could be lame, leaving you unfulfilled and more annoyed than before you did the do.
An E.D.G. is not…
The ex-whatever you still have feelings for. The ex that still has feelings for you. Another woman’s fiance (note I did not say boyfriend..stay tuned for that entry). A random homeless guy. A man you have no sexual attraction to whatsoever. The man you’d be ashamed to tell your friends about. Actually...
What warrants an emergency?
While this can vary, it’d be hard for a woman classify wanting to try something new as an emergency. A dry spell (length of time to be determined by the individual), needing relief from extremely high stress, repeated unfulfilling sexual encounters, unresponsive lovers…these things may arguably qualify.
Some of the side effects.
You could end up wanting more pumps thus creating a cut-buddy relationship. You might feel post-coital guilt. It may not have been fulfilling, thus amounting to a waste of time and an unnecessary number. Your boo could find out and give you a firm shaking.
So this is an idea I am toying with. Ladies, what do you think about the E.D.G.? Ever had one? Was it worth it? Fellas, ever been an E.D.G.? How did she approach you? What say you all?
Sowhatiff – You Wanna Be the Lucky Guy? - Jenkins
76 Responses to “Emergency D- in a Glass”
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Sowhatiff, what is the diff between an EDG and a FWB? Is FWB just a consistent “relationship,” whereas EDG is strictly emergency cases only?
Hmmm…great post! I don’t know if I’ve ever had the EDG, cuz I think it was more like FWB than anything.
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 12:46 am
I think an FWB is relationship that continues over time, as opposed to an EDG, which is generally a one or two time deal.
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I’m prolly in the minority in saying this, but I’m a dude who couldn’t comfortably play that role.
Yeah, I might think about it.
Or I might go for it… then change my mind.
Or get to the point where it’s said and done and feel really shitty about doing it afterward.
I dunno.
I’d just feel kinda weird pursuing sex just to make ME feel good, like it’s super-selfish.
I wanna share that kinda thing with someone I give a damn about.
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 9:55 am
I feel you…definitely an unexpected man-view of the EDG.
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An EDG is just an acquaintance with benefits as opposed to a FWB, only difference is frequency.
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Yes…….. I was. And I feel so ashamed.
lol, I’m just playing. One night stands that you have with someone that you actually have known for a long time. Nothing wrong with doing a friend a favor. I never mind.
Only problem is that you are not guaranteed a good performance. Esp with new coochie. I don’t know what kind of noises your going to make, and that could lead to a short night (Sounding all sexy in my ear). Now I HAVE to have a 2nd chance, just to restore my name. This leads to a FWB instead of an EDG.
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Slim Jackson Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 9:16 am
LOL Cheekz!
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I’ve had an EDG before…they work for me. Mostly they turn into friends with benefits but I have one…and it’s so cool because we’re really good friends…but then eventually it’s like okay-we’re going to do this and we’re going to enjoy it and then we go back to being regular friends I looooove this type of relationship
My president is for sure black yall. And he sleeping in the White House.
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I had one and ended up catching feelings.
My new E.D.G = Magic Bullet.
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Nyela Goodness Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 10:26 am
“My new E.D.G = Magic Bullet.”
LMAO! Nicki, your comments gon get me fired one day. I’m lauging wayyy too loud.
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:05 pm
LMAO!!!!!!
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Naturally Alise Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:07 pm
Oh yes! A bullet is an acceptable replacement, it has gotten me through some rough times…
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:35 pm
Most certainly.. it’s done more than a man can for me, yes ma’am.
Aw. except hold me. LOL.. that’s what a body pillow is for though…
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ife1love Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:37 pm
lmao @ “that’s what a body pillow is for”
they are nice and comfy tho
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Nicki Sunshine Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 3:46 pm
And a body pillow won’t have another chick over after me… or try to do a switcheroo with the condom (on one minute, off the next)
*dark place, dark place*
LMAO! I quit
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WithRainbowSprinkles Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 6:10 pm
you think?
vibrators are so unfulfilling…i need to feel that 215 lbs, not just 6 vibrating ounces…
EDG all the way!
(except, sometimes I feel bad…)
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I’m sorry, but isn’t an EDG just a nice phrase for “booty call”? I feel like a BC has the same criterion as an EDG and the same rules apply. Just a thought.
At any rate, there should be a thick (hehe) line between an EDG and a FWB. Some have already noted that the major distinction is contact, but I really don’t see how an EDG could ever become a FWB—it shouldn’t even make it to that point. If my EDG ever called me before 11pm, I shut it down. Sure, I’ll acknowledge you in the street, but you want to hang out
pause? No, thanks. You want to have a conversation? Like, a real one? No, thanks. There’s no reason for us to be friends, so just don’t make the effort; don’t ruin a good thing.Reply
I am a strong supporter of the E.D.G. theory. But I’ll have to admit that not all women can handle it. If you’re the kind of person who can enjoy sex as just sex without losing respect for yourself, then I say go for it! I have, and I will say that when done well, the effects can be LOVELY.
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 12:10 pm
Good point. Gotta be able to keep the emotions out of it. That’s part of my dilemma. Hence no 911 calls thus far. hehehe.
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I had an E.D.G when I went away to college. My boo was back at home, and I needed some luvin so I had no choice! It worked out pretty well, aside from the fact that the E.D.G got all “we go together now” on me, so I had to cut it off before the last semester ended… didnt want him spilling the beans! Now that im older and wiser… I couldnt do it again. I could only share my goodies with someone I really care about.
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A lovely informative post, Sowhatiff!
Naturally, when I read the title of this post, I thought of the classic SNL song, “Dick in a Box”. So, I wonder is, EDG, like the bougie version? Mental note guys, great Christmas present!
“Somethin’ special…it’s my emergency dick in a glass!”
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I did have a (really good) E.D.G. last year…and it was under extreme situations when I under great distress, so it did help me clear my mind and the cobwebs lol. But maybe it was a little too fulfilling, b/c it later turned to a long distance FWB situation…ugh…kind of a mess. I’m not really good at the no-strings attached booty call
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YAY! I’m actually early today. I have to keep minimizing the window since my co-workers keep getting up! I have to admit….me having an E.D.G. is about as likely as Michael Jackson being a normal person again. I just couldn’t do it. I’m not knocking anybody or anything but that’s just me. I’m even incapable of jumping straight into a romantic relationship. I ABSOLUTELY have to be friends and I mean really, really good friends with a guy before I could even consider taking that step. I think its maybe because it takes a TON to make me feel sexual about someone. A guy has to really break me down mentally and emotionally before I could do anything sexually with him. Breaking me down takes a while, since I have spent many years building up walls with security codes and everything, LOL
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Lonely, confused and horny
we’ve all been there…and lawwwd the idea of an EDG can b vurry attractive…
BUT I think there is pressure put on ppl by western society that creates this idea that if you’re not having sex on a regular basis you must not be happy or fulfilled.
Just the other day my co-worker said that one of the executives must be happy (cuz he always be smiling and humming) because he’s getting the good good on a regular basis????!!! I think that is somewhat shallow and one of the reasons a woman would be driven to go and cop an EDG or FWB whether in a relationship or not.
I think we (ladies) need preserve the pum pum more …give it 2 someone who deserves it
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Robin Monique (formerly Skinny Black Girl) Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 12:44 pm
Well, I can’t speak on behalf of Western society, BUT, I know that I tend to operate better when I’m getting broken off on the regular. On many occasions I’ve walked into work with a swing in my step after a morning session. Also, it has been scientifically-proven that good sex releases endorphins, which promote health and healing.
I think that women need to learn to be more clear about what they want before getting into any kind of relationship. When you know what you want, you’re not easily driven to something that goes against that just because society says it’s “cool.”
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 12:47 pm
I must agree. After a wicked slam, I have been known to walk with a pep in my step, for few reasons.
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MaPockets Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 8:07 pm
WICKED SLAM. LOL x 2303912
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I am Peyso Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 9:21 pm
a pep? not a limp?
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Slim Jackson Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 12:47 pm
“Also, it has been scientifically-proven that good sex releases endorphins, which promote health and healing. ”
So does running on a treadmill.
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Robin Monique (formerly Skinny Black Girl) Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:02 pm
Um yeah. But running on a treadmill vs. an orgasm? Yeah right. Like that’s even a fair comparison.
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Slim Jackson Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:37 pm
Now I agree. I’d rather skeet. Point noted.
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Naturally Alise Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:06 pm
I guess running on a treadmill will tire you out enough to where you’d rather nap than have sex… *shrugging*
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 12:52 pm
I agree with:
“I think that women need to learn to be more clear about what they want before getting into any kind of relationship.”
I’m def not hating on the ladies who are able to handle the EDG’s & FWB relationships…cuz I’ve been there- its backfired but I’m sure for some it can work…but I know a lot of us tend to go into these relationships pum pum 1st not head first(omg ok even some of us go in head first) but u know what I mean?? lol…and thats the point I’m tryna get across….. so like u had said Robin we need to be clear in our minds about what we want
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Some of these comments scare me for a multitude of reasons that I am not able to disclose at this time. You women folk make me uneasy (no pun) sometimes.lol.
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 12:51 pm
Come on. Do tell. Do tell!
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:30 pm
Yea don’t be a punk…give to us!!!! lolllllllllll
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Cheekie Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:21 pm
Still waiting…
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Slim Jackson Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 5:28 pm
I understand the D in a Glass. As a male, yeah it’s nice to be the person gettin that call when it’s time to blast off. But…this is how feelings get hurt and this is what leads to a lot of NaCL in the streets. Yes, women can be selfish and just want someone to insert that good stuff into em and then be done…but then the dude just looks at you as his jump off.
But Slim, he’s my jump off too you know. It goes both ways.
Wrong. It goes three ways, but that’s not the point. From what I’m gathering, a lot more folks are open to being someone’s jump off than I thought. I don’t care if it’s a mutually beneficial dynamic. If the D*ck in a glass is someone you wouldn’t date and that really won’t serve any other purpose in your life, doesn’t that mean you are temporarily lowering your standards and overlooking some critical details (potential non-visible but potent STDs) just so you can get your rocks off? You’re basically saying that if you call him at midnight while he’s gettin a sloppy floppy from another chick, that it’s okay for him to come thru (pause) and smash you down as long as he washes it off cuz you don’t care what else he does as long as he pipes you right? Hmm….And if the D*ck in a Glass is someone you know and have flirted with, are you not just setting yourself up for emotions to get involved or to have him standing outside your window peeping in to make sure no one else put a prize in your box? I feel better now….and I still love everybody.
I’ma go stand behind this bullet proof glass now…oh hey Barack! Didn’t expect you to be standing here! So, how was it last night?
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 5:38 pm
Bullet Bullet!!!!!!!!!
doesn’t that mean you are temporarily lowering your standards and overlooking some critical details (potential non-visible but potent STDs) just so you can get your rocks off?
sharing is caring
have a good nite y’all
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This post and the conversation just inspired me to pull an old blog post out of the crates about my view on sexuality…
http://www.freewebs.com/robinmonique/apps/blog/entries/show/321635-like-sade-i-got-the-sweetest-taboo
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I had a few EDGs I say a few because it never seemed to work and I find myself looking for a replacement. It always got to the point when they wanted me be with them and leave my S/O, or I wasn’t fullfilled and had to go home feeling the same way or even worst now. I gave up emergency dick. I try to stay faithfull. I’m giving up meaningless sex.
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Wait, wait, wait. Perhaps I’m confused about this EDG thing? Is this someone you creepin with who means nothing? Cuz I don’t do nor condone that. I assumed the E in emergency was because there’s no SO. I have a whole different perspective, if so.
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Danielle Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:57 pm
Oh I might have misinterpreted an E.D.G but I thought it was for emergencies, in any case whether or not you have an S/O or not. Sometimes even when you try to make it work with S/O’s you need an emergency fix to make sure your still legally sane.
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Nyela Goodness Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:20 pm
I can’t tell you how much I, respectfully, disagree. If it’s not working out with your SO, there needs to be an emergency break-up, not an emergency pumpington with someone else.
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MaPockets Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:25 pm
LOL!! An E.B.U.!! “It’s not me…it’s you…wait…that’s not what I meant to say…”
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Yeah Whatev Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:30 pm
“If it’s not working out with your SO, there needs to be an emergency break-up, not an emergency pumpington with someone else.”
I totally agree. That’s like having your cake and eating it too. Why are so many people just fine with creeping on their S/O’s these days is beyond me? Ok maybe it was always that way before, but people are so much more open with it now. We are living in a “E.D.B. F.W.B. Jumpoff” type of society now despite rampant STD’s going around. Not saying that some people aren’t using condoms and stuff, but those things are not completely reliable all the time. Plus, I don’t know about anyone else, but I would like to know everything I could about the person’s health records, their sexual history, and I want to see a valid, very recent ( as in a test taken no less than a few days before we do it) test with a Dr.’s signature (just for extra safety measures). I don’t see anyone implying that you can/should get all that info on an E.D.B.
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Danielle Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:40 pm
“That’s like having your cake and eating it too.”
Who ever said you can’t have your cake and eat it too.
@ Yeah Whatev so do you ever have any spontaneous sex.
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Ladies (and gents) what did ya’ll REALLY think of Michelle’s dress last night???
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Slim Jackson Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:49 pm
**gritting his teeth**
Grrrrr….
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:53 pm
Yea I’m obama-d out…pls no more…..it’s EDG day lol
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Danielle Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 1:58 pm
Absolutely Gorgeous.
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ChokLitFacory Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:15 pm
Thanks Danielle, but I think I hit a nerve…
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Cheekie Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:42 pm
LOL. That dress sure had people talkin’. Wait which dress? Ah well, I’ll comment on both.
I was a bit surprised by her choice, it was very traditional First Lady like (which, is not her). But, I do love how she changed it up a bit with the color. I love when people brighten up winter a bit with summery colors.
The night dress? HIT! The color, the dress. Gorgeous. And dammit if I didn’t turn green with envy watching the mad love displayed between Barack and Michelle. It was so sweet, though! Their dance! The twirl! Ah, black love.
Also, I bet she put it on him during their first night in the presidential bed. Yeah, I thought it…and said it.
ETA: Oh!
…sorry Slim! lol
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Slim Jackson Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:51 pm
“Also, I bet she put it on him during their first night in the presidential bed. Yeah, I thought it…and said it.”
Sadly, I thought the same thing. Like immediately thought about what kinda sex they’d have in there. Like would it be passionate love-making or doo-rags and high heel f*ckin with swearing and slapping? Leave all that elegance at the door. Sheeeit.
Has there been an adult film named “The Oval Orifice” yet?
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Cheekie Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:13 pm
“Like would it be passionate love-making or doo-rags and high heel f*ckin with swearing and slapping?”
In general, probably a mixture of both On the day he got inaugurated? Definitely the latter. Also the latter was done on the night got elected. If she did, can’t say I’d blame her…
*record scratch*
Now, wait the hell up! This is weird. I’ve NEVER had impure thoughts about my president. With the choices I’ve had (born in ’84), why would I? Obama is turning ish around on me here. It makes me uncomfy. I’m not supposed to think these things, dag nabbit.
Anyhow.
LOL @ “The Oval Office” adult film.
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Hi, world. So. Okay. I’m new to this blogging thing (don’t all say welcome at once). So, I think if your boo lives in the same city as you, you should never have any emergencies to begin with…if an E.D.G. is a cool concept to you and you indeed have an S/O, then kindly remove the S from the O and just call it what it really is! Now, if you’re doing the long-distance thing with your boo, then an E.D.G. should be nothing more than a fi(nger)gment o(r)f your imag(ic bullet)ination. Period. Ya’ll knew what ya’ll were doing when you/he/she moved a gajillion miles away! And lastly, if you have no boo at all then, hell, you are now free to move about the country.
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Robin Monique (formerly Skinny Black Girl) Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:20 pm
Preach!!
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Slim Jackson Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 2:37 pm
Welcum to Three Ways!
*Welcome
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Nyela Goodness Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 3:56 pm
hahaha! I laughed heartily. You betta tell it!
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Ironman Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 8:26 pm
respect
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 11:55 pm
Welcome MaPockets!
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Great post! I’m new to this so…
I was never one that was bold enough to have a dick on the side. I mean if you ain’t happy with your man then just be out why bother with the heartache and misery of having a side dick cuz you know you gonna catch some feelings and then some. Like double dipping per se.
Now y’all done heard the rate of stds is rising and you wonder why?
Hmmm
I mean some women can justify that and maybe I’m old fashioned but if you’re going to have sex
I’d rather it be with one person at a time. Doesn’t really matter how many numbers you’re racking up
but when you’re doing 2-3 at a time, dude that’s nasty!
Plain and simple you’re running train on yourself.
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:11 pm
BAM BAM!!!
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Danielle Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:24 pm
“why bother with the heartache and misery of having a side dick cuz you know you gonna catch some feelings and then some.”
Everyone doesn’t fall in love with the person they’re sleeping with. And sometimes in long term relationships you tend to test the waters. It’s not a lack of love for your partner it’s a lack of excitement or a change of enviroment.
“Doesn’t really matter how many numbers you’re racking up”
That’s where the high std rate comes from.
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:33 pm
I’d like to point out that Jay had caught feelings….
Your boy Young Hov’ catchin feelings
and it’s messin up my dealings cause mami’s not willin….
That’s all 4 now…I’m going back into IPod world where I will wait for SLIM JACKSON to make his comments …the comments we’re all waiting 4!!! lol
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Slim Jackson Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:46 pm
I’m on that Mario Brothers star power. I’m flashing, invincible and immune to STD’s.
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Danielle Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 4:48 pm
no ones immuned
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I am Peyso Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 9:26 pm
hahahahahahahahahahahaqhahaha
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Nyela Goodness Reply:
January 21st, 2009 at 5:25 pm
“And sometimes in long term relationships you tend to test the waters. It’s not a lack of love for your partner it’s a lack of excitement or a change of enviroment.”
IMHO: I’m sorry, but a long-term relationship is not a test drive, so there should be no “testing of the waters”—that phase was called “dating.” Why not propose a change to your partner? Why not ask him to be spontaneous or propose your need for excitement? If stepping out is your first option, the love is clearly not that deep.
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I was an EDG. I felt used. I would get called at obscenely late hours, in obscenely bad weather, it was pitiful. I was a freshman, she was a senior. I was a little boy, she had the grown woman cutty. There was nothing I could do. I didnt catch feelings, i jus couldnt resist the cutty. She’ll call me from time to time nowadays just to say hi and my loins tremble
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Sowhatiff Jenkins Reply:
January 22nd, 2009 at 12:08 am
lol. Your loins tremble? Must have been some good stuff.
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Yes I had a E.D.G, and it was great!! We had a good situation he knew his role and I knew mine. At that time in my life ( a few months ago) it was worth it. Now I don’t want to play that role anymore. So I don’t contact my E.D.G anymore. I want to met someone I can develop a serious relationship with.
Now when those moments come when I want to call my E.D.G, I have to seriously pray and get busy doing something constructive.
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I’ve been both the EDG and FWB. Both situations could lead to great times. But sometimes both realtionships could go haywire. As long as both parties know their role I think it could work.
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Hello All,
I am new to this blogging world but I see that there are some interesting topics of discussion here!
So I think I became an EDG this past weekend and didn’t even know it. To make a long story short….there is this female from work (we’ll just call her Buns for now lol)! We have minimal interaction @ work. Simple “hi & bye” routine. So I see Buns out in the club on Friday and I was greeted with a hug which led me to offer to buy her a drink. Buns accepted and later we met on the dance floor where the chemistry was definitely there. Anyway we ended up at her place where I laid it down all nite AND the next morning!!! Buns blames it on the alcohol (shout out Jamie Foxx…great song). Was she still intoxicated the next morning ladies? Ummmm….NO! And she informs me that she has a man and wants us to go back to the way we were. Can she really separate this from her emotions ladies? I know I can with ease. The thing that throws me for a loop is that Buns lets me know that she is impressed with “my stamina” and then pops up in my office on Tuesday & Wednesday which has never happened prior to last Friday! WTF? To me she is making it very obvious and not living up to her end of the deal (which she requested keep in mind) of going back to how it was b4! Comments or advice?
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Black & Trapped in Toronto Reply:
February 12th, 2009 at 5:20 pm
Get it!! lmao
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Slim Jackson Reply:
February 12th, 2009 at 5:30 pm
Welcome to Three Ways!
Thanks for sharing your story. I think what you described happens a lot more than people are willing to admit. Sounds like she may be having some issues with hubbyboo. I actually have a post coming up that relates to some of the stuff you’re talking about. Make sure you keep tuning in to Three Ways!
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