The Sexuality Continuum
All of the posts on this site that relate to relationships are written from the perspective of 4 heterosexual folks. This doesn’t mean that our experiences can’t be applied to same-sex relationships or that we seek to exclude people; it just means that the source our stories and opinions are male-female relationships. But as you all know, human sexuality encompasses more than these “traditional” boo-matches.
We've all seen this picture before.
When I was growing up, I only knew about 1 type of sexuality: boys liked girls; women liked men. Sure, I “knew” what it meant to be gay, but that word was unfortunately used as a way to put down boys who were…how do you say…less boyish than the rest. I didn’t know what it meant for a man to be attracted to a man. I didn’t even know that women could be gay too until 6th grade. There were two women who lived next door to my aunt. I always wondered who they were to each other, but never got up the nerve to ask. Were they sisters? Best friends? Cousins? One day I learned that they were living together as wife and wife. As time wore on, the idea of people liking members of their same sex came more and more to the forefront.
But what about bisexuality?
First, let me be clear. I love men, Jimmy the Pipe, and all the other manly fixins. But apparently there are plenty of people out there who love and have relations with people of the same and opposite sex. And while I can appreciate the beauty that women possess, there won’t be any of that over here.
But this is where things get a little fuzzy for me. It’s easier for me to wrap my head around the idea of a woman being bisexual, or even just “liking other women” than for me to accept the idea that men can do the same. I don’t understand it, but I accept it. Clearly, this is a double standard, and one that I am not alone in, but why is that? What makes it more understandable, by many women and men alike, for women to like other ladies? Maybe it has to do with the roles men and women are expecting to fill. What is it about our ideas of manliness that makes a man’s bisexuality less acceptable? Who knows? *shrugs*
Is sexuality really fixed, or did we make it that way?
I was talking to my mother the other day about how kids seem to be more open to experimenting, but not necessarily declaring any particular sexual preference. I, like I always do, attributed this newfound freedom to the way sexual relationships have been portrayed on television. While there are certainly many stigmas still associated with “alternative lifestyles,” it’s way more common to find women kissing women or men kissing men, but each returning back to the opposite sex. To me, this feels like something new; like people are imposing something new on the masses. But to children of this generation, it has become more normalized. People seem more free to express or test the waters of their sexuality in ways that people couldn’t (or didn’t) 10 years ago.
Is there a such thing as a sexuality continuum? Has sexuality actually become more fluid or have people become more aware of/comfortable with the idea of trying new things? What do you think about men and women become more open to the idea of going back and forth between sexes to get sexed? What makes some people more open to it than others? Are you open to the idea?
True she’s pretty, but she better not try to hit on me,
65 Responses to “The Sexuality Continuum”
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I think society is more open to non traditional sexuality, which is why it seems mroe “prevalent” now. A show like Will and Grace wouldnt have rocked 40 years ago feel me? I do think there is a sexual continuum, we are just more aware of it now.
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i don’t or never will agree with homosexuality. i accept the choices of others and would never judge a person because of it. like you i’m more accepting gay women than i am of gay men. maybe it’s the actual acts each participate in. i think bisexual people are greedy. lol pick a side. also, i don’t think you can equally like both sexes. i was watching an episode of this season of the real world. there is a guy who declared he was bisexual on the first show. dude hasn’t brought one girl back to the house since the show started. he’s not bisexual. he’s gay.
i don’t know what makes some people more willing to try new things and go back and forth between the sexes. it’s like arguing what makes a person gay in the first place. nature vs nuture. *shrug*
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Ms. Cherry Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 12:48 am
“i was watching an episode of this season of the real world. there is a guy who declared he was bisexual on the first show. dude hasn’t brought one girl back to the house since the show started. he’s not bisexual. he’s gay.”
I disagree. I watched that episode too and felt bad for him when his new boo went all “you’re not really bi!” on him. Dating men is something that’s new for him and so while he’s away from home and away from the judgement of friends and family who would like him to be the “him” they’ve always known, he’s exploring his attraction to men. It’s like if you never ate pork your whole like and then finally admitted to yourself you’d really like to try real bacon, you might OD on it for a while. I doesn’t mean you don’t like turkey bacon anymore, or you’ll never eat it again, you just binge on swine for a minute.
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Tunde Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 6:48 am
i guess we’ll agree to disagree. because even if i like bacon at all, i’m still going to indulge in some turkey bacon. maybe that part got edited out. *shrug*
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As for women… Do you, but I can’t mess with it. I’d never know who I could trust to leave you alone with. I could never take you any more seriously than a fling here and there.
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Ms. Cherry Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 12:20 pm
“I’d never know who I could trust to leave you alone with.”
This IMO is an ignorant statement. Bi does not equal loose, promiscuous, or cheater.
Bisexual women get stuck with some of the WORST stereotypes and they’re just that. Yes as we’ve all read Junie is open and lives her sex life large and free… more power to her, do ya thang, but that a) doesn’t means she’s untrustworthy and b) doesn’t mean every bisexual woman is into all of that.
Amber Rose was interviewed on some radio show last Fall and but to rest all the rumors of wild threesomes and ish going down w/ her and Yeezy. The host of the said radio show was shocked to hear that she’s never had a threesome and never had anyone come in through the back door.
A good friend of mine who’s bi had a convo with a guy recently who got his feathers all ruffled up cause his girl told him that she had dated women in the past and he got immediately insecure and flipped out and my comment to him was he needs to grow up. I’m sure he has some things in his past she wouldn’t be doing back flips over.
I don’t mean to jump down your throat about this, but that statement just rubbed me the wrong way. Unless you’ve dated a few bisexual women and had some bad experiences I think you’re being well… a d*ck. Like to say to someone, because of your sexual orientation you’re now only good for beats?! Really!?! #princesideeye
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 12:31 pm
this is why i just had to bite my tongue….
but this is also why i only date men who are mature mentally….and get it….
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Nokware Knight Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 2:00 pm
OK. I’ll bite. I can’t seem to stop writing these long essays for comments. Don’t know if it makes sense, but I just started typing…
No, not just good for a roll in the sack. I’m just as fine being friendly. But it’d sure make me think twice about a relationship.
Could that be an insecurity of mine? Sure. I actually never thought about it that way until now.
The thought of a serious girlfriend who gets in on with other woman, physically and/or emotionally (whether I’m there or not), does make me think of the prospect of her leaving for something that’s awfully hard to compete with – for who knows a woman better than a woman? Insecurity and ignorance, horay!
From what I’ve seen from the men that cheat, it’s sometimes emotional, but hardly ever. It was someone chasing some new nooky for the sake of it and eventually got caught with their pants down.
The story of the woman who cheats is one I’ve also heard time and time again as well. Ususally, their significant other does something that upsets them (the degree varies), and they go to the arms of a male friend they confide to for emotional support. That turns in to some sort of physical comfort. And, while the intention may be just a shoulder to cry on, things can become awry quickly.
Now I’ve always liked my women to have some independence, a life that is her own. If I’m in a serious relationship with you I want you to have your own friends, your own social life. Part of that is selfish. I want you to bring something back to the relationship (and a little free time to think to myself). Part of that is because I want my significant other to experience life outside of me, to want to be here and not necessarily feel she needs to be here or it’s convenient.
Friends are important. I want you to have that close someone you can go talk to when you need someone besides me. Someone you can have a shoulder to cry on or yell at to get a different perspective, or tell them how I f*cked up and keep me in check. I think it’s helpful to have these outlets, and they can keep relationships honest.
But I don’t want that close someone to be anybody you have any chance or notion of wanting bed. Even if I deserve it. That’s the selfish man talking again. And when it’s emotional comfort and not physical attraction driving that, anything can happen.
Now, if you’re a straight woman and we get into some heated back and forth about how you don’t like how I’m doing, I wouldn’t be so comfortable with you going to some dude’s shoulder to cry on, as opposed to a woman. I’ve seen the danger of it too often.
I’ve never had a woman that I haven’t had challenge me or go back or forth with. I like em that way, not afraid to say what needs to be said. I think it keeps me honest and makes me a better man. That preference comes with its baggage, cause there is always some extra expression to be let out, with me or elsewhere.
Now if you’re a bi-sexual women who are you going to run to when times get tough? Cause relationships are committed works in progress, not fairy tales. Outside of family, the chances of infidelity increase to me. And often times that has little to do with how permiscuous a woman may be.
And I guess because, as was said, I’ve never dated a bi-sexual woman, my scope might be limited. But if I know one thing about women – no people in general – they always need some sort of outlet or support. Cause bottling whatever you got going on inside usually can’t be handled alone. Cause everyone has issues.
Now is it ignorant to think that you would sleep with everyone and anyone if your bi-sexual? Sure is. But that’s not my point. I’m not thinking about a girlfriend who might sleep with everyone under the sun. But a girlfriend who might just crumple into someone else’s arms who was there for them when they needed somewhere else to go besides me.
My apprehensions are not necessarily based on or limited to biases about sexuality, but my biases on women’s emotional behavior in general. And maybe they need to be changed. Not all are the same of course, but I’ve seen that enough to look out for that. There are emotional male cheaters. But I just don’t see it that often.
Perhaps I just haven’t been there enough to know. But as far I as I know bi-sexual woman aren’t different than heterosexual women as people go that leaves a lot of room for questions that I’m unfamiliar with answering.
Maybe the cure is dating outside of the sexual orientation I’m familiar with, women who fall in love with people no matter what the other’s sex is? Perhaps you could hook me up on a blind date. But just make sure you tell me her name before you do her sexuality. That way, I’ll be sure to put who she is before everything else.
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Nokware Knight Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 2:05 pm
This blog is going to get me fired.
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Nokware Knight Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 2:09 pm
I think I’m going to have to start using a monkier/new user name or something.
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Nokware Knight Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 2:42 pm
How come no-one’s replying anymore? I feel like I’m getting the stupid face, lol.
Anyway, I don’t see any right or wrong answers with these things. But as with any relationship, you do have to know what you can handle. What’s right for you.
And yes, there’s always room to grow. Apparently you all have found out a place that
I need to.
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lol….good read…
im bisexual (since the age of 6 as ive said before). anyways, ive states my love for women plenty of times all over the internet…i love it. sorry, but i love a woman to ride my face. and i love threesomes…so my boyfriend is lucky. i dont mind people making stupid assumptions about something they know nothing about (most people are ignorant stereotypical hypocrites). “bisexuals are greedy”? lmao. well the whole d*mn world is full of selfish a$$ people these days…so its no different. even if that were the case, at least we dont hide our greedy ways like the rest of you selfish hypocrites. and yes i do believe the world is full of selfish pieces of sh*t. not angry, just my honest observation.
i do agree that i dont love each the same….im more attracted to men and will marry a man one day.
but i laugh when guys feel they could never know who they could trust around me. like bisexuals just go around f*cking any and everybody. nah doesnt work that way. i mean do you as a heterosexual (i assuming because the pic got me a little confused) man just go around f*cking any and every woman. well the way yall men are these days, that probably is the case lol. but just because someone is bisexual doesnt mean they are a cheater….im sorry but where is common sense these days. i mean, would you as a straight(?) man just automatically cheat if left with another woman while in a relationship.
any future religious talk i will laugh at right now to get it outta the way ahead of time———> LMAO!
to each his own. i look foward to laughing at future comments…
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SoBKAllDay Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:05 am
“i love it. sorry, but i love a woman to ride my face. and i love threesomes…so my boyfriend is lucky.”
YES, YES HE IS! GOD BLESS YOUR SOUL…8-)
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:27 am
LMAO
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Miss Jenkins Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:09 am
Thanks for your honesty…
Question: Is your attraction to women strictly physical? Or do you think you could be (or have you been) romantically involved with a woman, even though you want to ultimately marry a man?
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:31 am
my attraction to women is mainly physical which is why i never have relationships with them. i dont have any female friends because i feel women have too much sh*t with them…so i could never be in a relationship with one….in the future. ive tried in the past….fail. cant deal with the nagging lol. women are just good for me to look at…and lick. sorry, im blunt most of the time.
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Reecie Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 11:14 am
“i dont have any female friends because i feel women have too much sh*t with them…”
oh brother.
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 11:57 am
lol. i meant from my past experiences with them….just a lot of backstabbing year in and year out. so i just gave up.
but most people these days seem to have a lot of ish with them…i wasnt really trying to only include women….its just that i was asked about women specifically…
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Dr. J (@DrJayJack) Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:36 am
Y’all ain’t got a clue what you’re getting yourself into with Junie. This girl needs to be kept around. #VERIFIED
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:42 am
ok, i will admit, my mama is a freak too(found way too many things she doesnt know about….um KY jelly lol…and her and my dad needed to be a little more quiet lol). i swear i think its in my blood. seriously, i have been doing sexual things since age 5 before i even looked at p*rn or knew what s*x was. s*x really is a main focus of my life. i cannot help it. not addicted but i think its my phat cl*t that keeps me h*rny 24/7….like my thighs hit it or something as i walk. idk. maybe i just need to start wearing underwear lol…
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Miss Jenkins Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 9:08 am
#hatetodoit, but let’s try not to get the site blocked at work…
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 9:12 am
wait, i thought i blocked everything…..oh nevermind i see the words…sorry….im new to this and keep forgetting…..
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Slim Jackson Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 11:57 am
@Junie
I just realized what you said in this thread. You callin momma a freak in the sheetz? Is not anything sacred anymore?lol.
Last week it was you taking down 10-inch pieces. Now you’re bi and live for s*x? You, my friend, are a unicorn and don’t exist…unless you send the appropriate footage/evidence to slimjackson@toohotfortv.com
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 12:07 pm
lmao!
i called her that because it is true. im just a realistic type of person…and i have no problems with coming to terms with the fact that older people in my family are sexual beings just like i am. we’re just liberal like that. and im really starting to wonder if thats where i got it from genetically or something…
but im most definitely real lol. is that a real email?
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CHeeKZ Money Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:18 am
I want Juniebug to raise my daughters….
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:32 am
im betting thats sarcasm…which is my favorite thing by the way lol.
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ASmith Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:49 am
Not from Cheekz(ies)…
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 9:06 am
i couldnt tell…usually i can spot sarcasm easily….
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Slim Jackson Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:08 am
Thank you for keeping the comments clean. Phew. I got nervous for a sec given the topic.lol.
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:15 am
i messed up as usual though lol….
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Cheekie Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:34 am
“but just because someone is bisexual doesnt mean they are a cheater….im sorry but where is common sense these days.”
I always laugh at this assumption, too. And I truly wonder where it comes from. It’s sort of the same thing with people who automatically tense up when someone of the same sex (who is attracted to the same sex in general) is around them, as if they are AUTOMATICALLY attracted to them just because they are the same sex. Um, everyone has standards
except those who kiss whatever Flava Flav isso it’s good to keep in mind that there is a possibility that while they are attracted to your sex/gender, they may not be attracted to YOU.But yeah, there are cheaters in all shapes, colors and sexes. There is plenty to choose from for everyone, so a hetero person is just as likely to cheat as a bisexual person.
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:49 am
exactly…
and most definitely LMAO @ “except those who kiss whatever Flava Flav is”…..
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Nokware Knight Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 11:50 am
Kudos. Yep, I’m straight. Bi is more than cool by me, my lady. Doesn’t say anything about your person. But if it were you and I, we’d probably be just friends. Love the honest feedback.
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 12:00 pm
thank you, and i respect your opinions….
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wy39Sl1i5ls
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 8:37 am
wait, what the h*ll lmao. i never knew that was a little boy who sung that song! i feel like i would have been right along with him dancing in the video at his age….
FREAKS! ok, i have no shame about being that.
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I think people are DEFINITELY more open to trying new things. I see it amongst my friends and it’s interesting how there’s not a lot of pushback. I think that not only are people more open to doing it, but others of us are a bit more accepting.
I think what’s also interesting aside from the double standard many of us hold with regards to homosexuality is that we’ll accept a woman who says she’s bisexual. We’ll concede that she gets down with men and women and that’s cool, but a guy? Oh a guy who claims he’s bisexual is lying through his pearly white teeth. He’s gay and that’s all.
Where DOES that come from?
And though I support my friends and all their experimenting, I can’t. A friend of mine once asked me if I would ever consider dating women. I didn’t hesitate to say no, but it wasn’t just because I’m not sexually attracted to them. I started making a list of all the reasons, aside from non-sexual attraction, that I couldn’t date women.
Men… how you do it, I’ll never know. But thank you. LOL
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Renee Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:33 am
Co-sign, I just had this same conversation with a friend randomly, I could never deal with the emotional bs, the bitching, etc. I once heard one of my Bi friends on the phone with her girl (who is a stud by the way), and she was just whining endlessly, I wanted to take the cell from my friend and tell homegirl to stfu…I don’t have time or patience for it.
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ASmith Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:51 am
It took one of my friends like a year to really break up with her ex. It was disturbing. She would go to the store and call my friend saying she couldn’t get out the car because she was so distressed so my friend would have to go to the store and sit with her. In the parking lot. Nobody would get their groceries.
I was like WHY, Jesus? Tell this bish to SADDOWN and get some friends.
And, to be unfairly stereotypical, I’ve seen girls get crazy behind a dude, but behind a female? MAAAAANNNN that mess is TOO.MUCH.
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I think it all goes back to a few of my last posts on SBM. This is a new day and age. Women have truly become queens on the chessboard. They doing any and everything they want to do with no regard for social norms. I can’t hate, I shrug. Is this bicuriosity new? Hell no, they just was afraid of being judged before. Nowadays, chicks have Johnnie Cochran’s autobiography in their back pocket. Moreover, like I said last Thursday, women are liberated. Plymouth Rock has landed on us men. A woman can have sex with who ever and when ever they want, a man is on serious rations in this recessive state. Like I said, all I can do is shrug.
As far as men, you do not see a lot of switch hitters. I tend to agree with Tunde, you have a lot of dudes sexing chicks, but on the low (pun intended) they’re gay. If they didn’t feel they would be judged they would come all the way out of their walk in closet they had put in the crib.
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I have no problem w/ homosexuality or bisexuality or trisexuality. What you eat dont make me sh!t. I like girls. However, what I do have a problem with is gay men who choose (yea i said choose) to be more feminine than women and gay women who choose to be more masculine than men. YOU’RE FAKING IT
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Miss Jenkins Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 9:31 am
However, what I do have a problem with is gay men who choose (yea i said choose) to be more feminine than women and gay women who choose to be more masculine than men.
This bugs me to no end. I don’t know any woman who switches like they have broke hips or drops/flails their wrist around like it’s her job. #Idontgetit. Thix bugs me more than the masculine women b/c (at least from a distance) they are doing what men do.
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 9:42 am
ugh….or smack their lips….or roll their eyes….list just goes on and on
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 9:39 am
i have to agree with this one too….
this is why i dont like trannies either. as open minded as i usually am, i just dont like to see men acting like women(females?). i guess its because im bisexual and i like each sex for what they are. i like men for their d*ck and muscles(among other things)…and women for big a$$es and sensuality. i dont want a man who is sensual like a female, or a woman who is masculine like a man.
oh and the women who use strap ons to f*ck other women…thats funny to me too. you might as well just get a man who actually knows how to stroke it lol.
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QueenT Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 9:52 am
I love trannies. They are so much fun. They have it the hardest out of all the groups that get discriminated against….because they are so flamboyant with their behavior. They are just being themselves. I don’t discriminate against any gay identifying groups or lifestyles. None it it really affects me….it all falls under the umbrella of Homosexuality……
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:03 am
yes i do recognize that they have it the hardest….
but my thing is that they choose to live that lifestyle…they choose to live as women and to catch the worst h*ll. they could just be a normal gay. i know crazy, buy my mind is like that most times. i mean, i guess you could say all homosexuals choose to do that too (depends on what you believe). but with trannies(or transexuals…is there a difference?), they take it too far. its one thing to be gay, but to live as a woman is a whole nother thing. i just cant get with that. and then they take it even further by tricking people and acting as if real women are somehow jealous of them and that all men would secretly sleep with them. can you tell i have personal issues with them lol. im sorry but they have even tried to trick ME lol. i guess thats what i get for liking women….
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CHeeKZ Money Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:51 am
I gotta agree with you. I actually co-sign stomping on those particular chi chi man.
I am fine with you doing what you do.. but it should be illegal to try to deceive people into being with you. People should come to a tatoo explaining explaining who they are, who they were, and what they are into.
As your future partner, I have a right to know that you use to be a man (please save me Pause Gods).
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 11:05 am
i have said they should have the letter T branded on their forehead like the scarlet letter A….but i know thats just mean. but seriously, these muthaf*ckas be trying to trick me. *ok calm down junie* WOOSAAAH
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Miss Jenkins Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:58 am
hmmm, while they may have it the “hardest” to some degree, lots of other people can’t opt in and out (pause) of what brings them discrimination…
But then that gets us back to whether it is a choice or a natural born thing. All I know is that I can’t choose my blackness. Granted, I would if I could. My skin glows something lovely in the summer
.
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Peyso Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 11:14 am
I can understand if u feel u were naturally born gay but I CANNOT AND WILL NOT understand if you have to act more outlandish than woman
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Ms. Cherry Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 12:35 pm
“However, what I do have a problem with is gay men who choose (yea i said choose) to be more feminine than women and gay women who choose to be more masculine than men.”
I can see this is gonna be a day where I just fuss at everyone…
Okay so there’s a difference between sexual orientation and gender identity. People express both of those different. Masculine and feminine are also social constructs. Personally I think it take a real man to have the balls enough to express their true selves and life their truth.
I get if you don’t understand it, but don’t judge it. I have a friend who most people call Lesbian but she considers herself Queer…. why? because she doesn’t 100% identify with being feminine and “woman”. She is on the voluptuous side and she has many struggles with how “female” her form is. She wears tight sports bras and dresses like a “man”. She carries herself in a very masculine way. In relationships she wants to take on all those traditional male roles (that most of you “real men” seem to hate on and and not want to claim #imjussayin) she insists on paying for meals, being the bread winner, opening doors and all that chivalrous stuff.
Her masculinity is just as important to her and her identity as her sexual orientation.
I will say I get annoyed by queeny b*tches who feel the need to be loud, obnoxious. That ish is NOT CUTE! I also hate that young black lesbian couples feel the need to grope and tongue each other down on the train/bus… especially when there are a lot of people around. I also try to remind myself that it’s a phase that most of the children grow out of by the age of 25 (which is why I ID before I hag).
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Peyso Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 12:46 pm
I think u missed what I said or am saying or trying to say. I get that some dudes or girls have a problem with male or female identities as constructed by society. However, this doesnt mean only show the completely exagerated version of the opposite sex’s gender norms. I dont have an issue when a (wo)man chooses to exhibit some actions usually attributed to the opposite sex. However, my issue is when a man chooses to act more “feminine” than a woman (or vice versa). I get that there might be a lil twang in your voice, or you might like a few women’s clothing items, your lip gloss might be popping or you switch a bit when you walk. I get that. But when it approaches a point where its almost mockery of the sex or you only capture the negative stereotypes of a sex, I get upset and disturbed.
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 12:48 pm
hmmmmm…ok ok i gotcha point on this one…
its just the trannies i dont like…..from personal experiences. but it really doesnt have anything to do with their choice of being a tranny….
to each his own as i always say….
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Little Miss Sunshine Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 1:05 pm
“I have no problem w/ homosexuality or bisexuality or trisexuality. What you eat dont make me sh!t.”
no more needs to be said.
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I love D*ck. It’s real simple with me. I can’t even imagine being with a woman. You know how some women say She can eat my box but I won’t eat her box…or men say I’m a top not a bottom. Come on – you’re gay either way. There is nothing a woman can do for me physically. I love having friendships with women. They are my greatest allies in friendship and all of that…I can appreciate a nice looking woman, but its not arousing for me.
I don’t really understand homosexuality. I haven’t quite figured out if you’re born that way or its a choice. I think they deserve to get married and have kids..whatever they want to do. As far as religion, I am a Christian so I believe in what the Bible says about Homosexuality. However, I will leave it up to God to be the final judge on that…
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Ok real talk, I think labels are so stupid. This “sexual continuum” is not something new. Back in the 50s Kinsey bursted the conservative scene with his theories on sexual continuums (Kinsey scale ranks them 0 to 6) and concluded that very few people are 0 (completely hetero) or 6 (completely homo). Most people lie between the 2 extremes. While I think sexuality is a lot more complex, I at least think his sliding scale is more accurate than today’s 3-category limits of hetero, homo, bi.
Because I don’t think I fit completely in any group. I love women. I think they’re God’s most beautiful creation. I’m someone that can’t concentrate on a woman’s face if her boobs are amazing and out. If I walk behind a nice booty, my eyes fixate on it and I can’t make it stop lol. Yet I don’t think I could be emotionally attracted to a female (cuz they’re crazy), and I’ve never (well not since childhood) so much as KISSED another woman. It’s just not there for me. And trust me, if I wanted to, I would. So what does that make me?
I just think labels are another way we put people in “them” vs “us” groups. And since I’ve never really fit in any of the traditional usvthem groups, I don’t plan on putting myself in one regarding sexuality either.
But I do plan on MANY a toi’s with my future hubby. I want to make a game out of it, like who can pick up the most women and get them to come home with us. And we’ll keep a tally over time lol!! Not kidding…
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ASmith Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:06 am
I just think labels are another way we put people in “them” vs “us” groups. And since I’ve never really fit in any of the traditional usvthem groups, I don’t plan on putting myself in one regarding sexuality either.
That’s the thing. We like boxes, and if you don’t fit into one cleanly, we either ridicule you or force you into one anyway and get mad because you don’t really fit.
A friend of mine overheard a conversation in the airport once. Apparently 2 guys knew a woman who identified as lesbian but was in a relationship with a man at the time. She told me they sounded baffled and concerned. “What’s the big deal?” she wondered.
It’s hard for us to accept that people do what they want sometimes and sometimes we’re not going to relate on a personal level. Lord knows my friends stay doing mess I don’t understand, but I don’t need to find a reason why in order to accept it.
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:10 am
*big grin*….that is my plan too….and to have a contest between me and my husband to see who can make a woman squirm the most by eating her out….
you are my new best friend…..
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:11 am
oh this was meant for Joey lol….
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“Is sexuality really fixed, or did we make it that way?”
I think we made it that way. Sexuality is very socialized, which is funny since I believe only the person who holds the “sexuality” has the right to identify themselves. I see dude on The Real World (Mike, I think?) was referenced above and I also believe him to swing toward men a bit more than women. I predict him to come out as completely gay later on, but my prediction is just that, a prediction. I don’t, however, believe I should force my speculation on his identity like some of his roomies have been doing. They’re like, “Oh, no, you’re gay.” Yeah, and how can you tell HIM how he identifies himself? Oh, right, you can’t. You can think what he is all you want, but he is who he effing says he is. As for bisexuality, I actually do believe it exists. I believe in the wide spectrum of sexuality, not the extreme two ends of the spectrum only, nor that there is only one type of sexuality. I do think there are variations. And I think those feelings are just like any other feelings…ones that can’t be controlled.
My little cousin identifies as bisexual and he has told me that he leans more toward men. And I notice this pattern with several bisexual people. I guess my question is, is there ever a point where a bisexual person is truly attracted to both sexes equally? Because, in my experience, I’ve only witnessed the former. I’m asking sincerely here to anyone who identifies as such. I’m definitely interested in the dialogue here today!
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 10:56 am
well as far as a sexual/physical attraction, yes im attracted to both equally in that way.
as far as attraction in the area of relationships, i only have an interest in men in that way.
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Reecie Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 11:39 am
but unless you plan on being in physical only relationships for the rest of your life, you indeed value/are attracted to men more, per what you just typed.
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juniebug Reply:
March 15th, 2010 at 11:46 am
yes you are right. thats why i only have relationships with men….
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Maybe we should stop trying to define people and what they do. Our society is intent on defining everything and holding people to those definitions, labels, and boundaries. Stepping outside what is “normal” makes those who refuse to be open uncomfortable. As soon as we pop out of our mothers’ womb, we are subject to society’s standards of who we should be, what we should do, and how to do it especially in terms of one’s sexuality. (oh she’s a girl give her pink, she can’t be a tomboy, that little boy can’t play with dolls, etc etc).. I say DO YOU and that is what the younger generations of today are doing, I just hope they can learn to do so safely and responsibly. Futhermore, figure out at some point what YOU want to do, what makes YOU feel right, and make sure YOU are not ONLY following a trend or society’s “right” standards
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What do you think about men and women become more open to the idea of going back and forth between sexes to get sexed?
Homosexuality or bi-sexuality isn’t a new concept. And there are many things people do in private and choose not to reveal (for any reason). I don’t care about what other people do sexually. I just hate it with humans start de-humanizing other humans. Breaking them down into social talking points. Very wack…
What makes some people more open to it than others?
Preference, I guess. Why am I more open to dating a woman with natural hair opposed to a perm? While I like being able to touch
or pulla lady’s hair without her tripping about just getting a perm, some guys like to get poked in the butt. To each his/her own… Who cares?Are you open to the idea?
I, personally, don’t find other men attractive. But I don’t mind the idea of people being involved with other people of the same sex. Even if there was people of the same sex making out, I wouldn’t really care unless they were two attractive women. Then, I would watch and smile. lol
We should worry less about people who are open about their homosexuality, and focus on those tards that judge anyone who’s different.
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