Visit Our Store!
Do I Really Have to Choose?
The Cookie Monster soon regretted his bougie lifestyle
A couple days back I wrote the first chapter in the book that will be Seattle’s Adventures in Bougie and one young lady congratulated me on “stepping out of the hood box and on into the bougie one.” Now I’m sure the comment wasn’t meant with maliciousness, I hope, but I have to admit I was a little taken back. I didn’t know I had to leave one box to get to the other (pause), I was planning on straddling both (pause again).
Did y’all know the deal? I surely didn’t get the memo with my monthly Black newsletter. No one told me. Where and when is that supposed to happen? Is an all black van going to pull up in front of my gig one day, grab me like the pledges from Old School and then drop me off at my house decked out in Banana Republic slacks and Aldo loafers with a Starbuck’s latte in my hand? I hope not, I like my collection of kicks, jeans and fresh shirts.
I love them almost as much as I love spending a dollar on an Arizona Fruit Punch or dropping a few dollars on the Minute Maid Pomegranate Lemonade concoction. I need diversity in my life. I like talking about how Clipse’s punchlines (“[negroes] running the race just to settle for Solange”) as much as I like talking about Barack’s Cabinet choices (I know he wants to create jobs, but did he need to employ the whole Clinton administration?).
Maybe you feel like I do or maybe you’ve made your choice and you’re sticking with it. Much respect either way. Question is, can we have both the “hood” and the “bougie” or do we have to choose?
Seattle – I’d like a Fruit Punch With My Spicy Tuna Maki Please – Washington
Special Shout Out to Ladebelle for inspiring this topic. See you don’t even have to suggest topics, just keep visiting and commenting.
37 Responses to “Do I Really Have to Choose?”
Comments
Read below or add a comment...
Leave A Comment...
RSS & Twitter
-
As filmmkaer Sea I understand. Its hard as hell to get anyone from either side to get you. My indie crowd is baffled that I love the first two Fridays (Soul Plane is used toilet tissue BTW) my hood crowd has no idea why I went to see “Girl with The Pearl Earring” (Scarlet Johansson aint a bad reason to see it).
Somehow I cant be from or still live in the hood and watch the News Hour on PBS
Way to many women just assume I know nothing of world affairs or the “inside stuff” thats right under our noses cuz I dont work in a “official” corporate gig. Its funny cause I have been killing relationships that have used this bougie model. Face it the men wouldnt act the way they do if they werent successful, the women would have never dated them if they werent successful at the time they met. I know fake ass PHD black men that married what they thought was some queen. No its regla ass Tanisha from Bed-Stuy went to Syracuse then Columbia but she is as ghetto as Biggie first album…now dude shocked and shes upset he cant handle her “realness”…BOUGIE!!!!!
Reply
Jac Reply:
December 12th, 2008 at 1:00 am
Temps, you are too much lol
Reply
reign Reply:
December 12th, 2008 at 11:24 am
LMAO… great example.
Reply
This post got me flashing on images of the Drop Squad coming through on dudes…Shouts to my dude Spike!
Reply
Ok-I don’t at all feel like you should have to choose. IN fact, last week on the Treehouse I was saying that the women need to stop acting so bougie like we don’t know the other side and commence to put a little hood in it especially for your man. It’s cool to get down and dirty sometimes. Personally, I just don’t feel you should act all high and mighty regardless of what you have achieved. That’s just not cool.
Reply
Oh great, NOW this post is up!
Reply
The line between hood and bougie is mad blurry. You’ve got different ways of doing the same roles, but at the end of the day, its all the same thing. I feel like its all about not caring what people want to say. I’ve been developing a thing for wine recently. A good syrah, or a cold Riesling really can put a nice cap on the nite. If I want to drink it out of an old jelly jar that I saved immigrant style, that’s my perogative. If my girl wants to mix a cheap blush with some kool-aid and call it ghetto sangria, that’s hers. Now of course, not everyone is gonna accept that. People always wanna hate on the way your living your life, one way or another. That just means you’re looking pleased while doing what you do (pause).
Reply
BLaCk Bruce WaYnE Reply:
December 12th, 2008 at 10:56 am
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA….
“If my girl wants to mix a cheap blush with some kool-aid and call it ghetto sangria, that’s hers. “
Reply
ChokLitFacory Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 12:53 pm
HILARIOUS!!
Reply
Straddling the fence between “hood” and “bougie” can be a bit of a task. People may accuse you of being a “double agent” if you know what I mean.
Reply
I’m thinking you can be both although I may be a little more bougie… I will get the hood out when need be.
Don’t you kinda have to be both, working in corporate America?
Reply
reign Reply:
December 12th, 2008 at 11:22 am
Unfortunately you need the bougie to be taken seriously, and the hood attitude may have to come out once in while to keep them jumping and in their place. Both in a way commands respect.
Reply
Nicki Sunshine Reply:
December 12th, 2008 at 12:42 pm
I couldn’t have said it better, reign.
Reply
Seattle, F the choosing. I look at it as diversifying your life. I don’t see anything wrong with being able to have your lunch equal to a beef pattie w/ cocoa bread and a side of cola champagne or having your dinner be at place where peanut squah soup as your starter, a seared steak (med. well) with poched potates as an entree. Lastly, with a 1979 wine from the grape vines of Sonoma Valley to compliment. It’s called experiencing life.
I used to think that it would be best to choose but why do you have to? Because society says so or the black community has to separate “the real” from the fake? I think it’s a good thing to have both sides in your life whether it be bougie or hood. I’d rather be separated from the rest that have already picked their respective sides because it would be kind of boring if you picked one side and stuck to it all the time. If you kept it ‘hood’ there would be a part of you that would sit there and wonder or yern for that bougie side. And if you’re on the bougie side you would have a wonder of “why do I have to keep up with the luxury lifestyle? Why can’t I just rock some SBs and t-shirt?”
I think there needs to be a third box and that should be called ‘DIVERSIFIED’. This box is for those enigmas and hybrids who may feel in tune with both sides but a tad out of touch for either one. I’m sitting in it and loving it.
You’re all Welcome….Enjoy!
Peace in Baghdad
-BBW
Reply
I don’t think that growth is about shunning your “hood” as much as it is about being open to new things. I absolutely adore sushi and Patron laced margaritas. But please believe I’ll cop a $4 bottle of Arbor Mist and SMASH some sauce-drenched wings and fries in a minute!!
Reply
“Question is, can we have both the “hood” and the “bougie” or do we have to choose?”
It’s possible to do both! Isn’t this the equivalent of using your “corporate” (read: YT) voice at work and using your “hood” (read: ninja) voice at home. Both of which, I think I’ve (along with a lot of my fellow brothas/sistas) mastered.
Reply
LOL This is a great post and an even funnier picture.
Listen I spent my college career trying to lose the bougie and gain some hood. I’m now in between. I still talk like a Becky but I can flip out like Shaniqua.
Reply
aww… seattle… now i feel bad… (kinda but not really) but it really wasn’t meant to be malicious! i promise…
now that i’m done groveling for forgiveness, onto today’s comment…
i don’t think that you have to choose but i think that as with all things, a certain amount of balance is in order or as you put it “straddling the line”… being well versed in hood tendencies is just as important as being well versed in bougie tendencies… you’ve got to be adaptable in today’s world…
lemme stop my comment here before my tongue (or keyboard) sparks something else…
Reply
Why should we have to choose? Being Black doesn’t mean we’re ONE kind of way. We all are unique. We don’t all like the same things, do the same things or talk the same way.
We should be able to embrace it all and be whoever we are–in whatever space that we are.
Reply
Oh, yeah, just gotta note that Cookie Monster eating Fig Newtons is the best representation of Bougie EVAH! Then again, he still has a little hood in him, eating the President’s Choice brand instead of the real deal.
Reply
ChokLitFacory Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 12:56 pm
I didn’t even know ya’ll had President’s Choice in the States! What cha’ll know bout Presiden’t s Choice??? Hahahah! They still No-name, just packaged nicer!!
Reply
Cheekie Reply:
December 15th, 2008 at 6:44 pm
Jewel-Osco sells them!
Reply
I think it is cool to appreciate things from either box; hood or bougie. But in reality I think everyone inadvertently finds themselves in one box more than the other because in actuality bougie vs. hood is really about your mindset not the products you purchase or places you frequent. For example I have a cousin who owns more designer labels than anyone I know but that’s b/c her dude is the local drug dealer. So in my opinion she is just a hood chick in bougie clothing. I have no problem recognizing I am hood chick, who has discovered some bougie things I like. I may love Chateau Margeaux but it’s usually from a Solo cup instead of a wine glass.
Reply
No Seattle you should not have to choose!! I feel everyone should live their life with an open mind and learn from every experience hood or bougie.
You had a great time at that fashion show, took great pics with your iPhone and most importantly you left with a greater appreciation for
short skirtsart.I think we run into problems when we start to forget where we came from (if you were raised in the hood).
And ppl will start to call you out if they see that occurring. I think we see this happen with a lot of underground rappers who have gone mainstream. There becomes a certain pressure from the hood to keep it hard (pause) or real. But once you start to move up the economic scale you get more opportunities to experience things and most likely these experiences will not be with ppl who look like you.
I look at like this, if you start to forget where you come from there is an office/world full of people who won’t let you forget
Reply
ayyo word up, Seattle. I messes wit the Clipse. (pause)
and forreal.. i stay gettin’ sushi w/ chicken wings from the chinese spot. i won’t chose.. no way..
Reply
I dont think u HAVE to choose….there’s nuthin wrong with bein w/ sum1 hood…or bein w/ sum1 bougie…i think it becomes a prob if either person is holdin u bak in anyway…for ex: If u keep havin to use ur savings to bail Rayquan out…u mite wanna leave hood alone lol.
Personally..this month is my anniv of leavin hood bruthas alone…a whole yr..wheww it was hhharrdd…j/k…i just think that i loved the hood figgaz for so long..i wasnt givin the otha bruthaz a chance.. we’ll see how long i keep this up..lol
Reply
i def think it is possible to be both hood and bougie…. i know i def have some of both (though recently i’ve been leaning towards the bougie side).
for example, i was at work doing my thing and listening to my boy Mavado. one of my clients decided that she didn’t want to do work that day, and asked me to do one of her assigned tasks. supposedly, she said i gave her the ill neck roll and shut her down. i, however, would say i was shocked by the audacity she had to ask me to do her work when i had my own to do, but i politely refused and offered her a tip to get it done lol. sometimes you can’t control when the hood comes out of you…esp when you are listening to those tunes.
so yeah. be both and be proud!
Reply
RightCoastLex Reply:
December 17th, 2008 at 2:19 am
DUPPY KNOW AH WHO FI FRIGHTEN!!!
Reply
Can we stop talking about “the struggle of being an educated black person” and TALK ABOUT THE CLIPSE! Those Obamas are one of the greatest rap duos every. Best since EPMD, more consistent than Red and Meth, and better lyricism than the Dog Pound. If your not talking about Outkast, you don’t know a better Duo. And that new mixtape doesn’t have the rest of the only decent REUP gang.
Seattle has had great taste in Hip Hop since he was 15. I’m not surprised he is a Clipse fan. But honestly that just goes to show you that you can be both ‘hood’ and bougie with your desirables. The Clipse my be the godfather of Cocaine rap, but they are intelligent. Most punchlines going over the head of the average listener.
Reply
^^^^ LOL at Cheeks
I wouldn’t describe myself as hood cuz I’m from Canada and we ain’t never had a hood since we’ve had free healthcare and low-income housing.
That being said, as black people, we have our ‘ways’ of doing things that is unique to us. But I’ve come to learn more things about the world and appreciate certain other ‘ways’ of doing things. That don’t make me bougie, just a little well-travelled I guess. And there is nothin wrong with straddlin the line either.
Reply
I hate these designations, so I just do me and try to ignore the pointless classifications of what I am too good or not good enough to do. I can never keep up anyway.
Reply
Another point on this is within my own fam. Post college I didnt get the great job etc, so between us its not really me and my stuff vs them and their stuff, at least on the surface.
I watch sports so I am tie with most men in the fam with that but say waiting for the Sun night game at 815?
If the jets played the 1pm I am watching to see what 60Min has on, my fam (my boys inculded) are all over Sportscenter or the OT on Fox or over at NBC. It also comes out in coffee I like or topics I casually delve into (WWII, ‘Nam The Bushes and their bull$hit, films soical relevance, social docs and films) with a matter of factness that I really do engage in this stuff. And of course it comes out when I bring home the NYTimes and Village Voice, and books like “Nickeled and Dimed”. I do all of this in the hood….I aint neva change!!!
Reply
You end up choosing the style that fits with you at that time and most people switch things up every once in a while. If you don’t have haters, then you’re probably not doing it right.
Reply
Slim Jackson Reply:
December 19th, 2008 at 12:57 pm
“If you don’t have haters, then you’re probably not doing it right.”
Excellent point.
Reply
New Poter…
Very simple….I believe the term is “borghetto”…LOL.
No, seriously, just like we have the switch we flip for when were are around the fam and when we are at work, you can maintain in both worlds. Black folks invented the art of the crowd straddle!
Reply
Seattle Washington Reply:
September 1st, 2009 at 6:54 pm
You’re quite right. It’s evolutionary, we need to do it to survive. I have to be as comfortable articulating what wine I’d like with my meal as I would rolling into the corner store and copping an Arizona Fruit Punch. If I don’t, I lose out on some aspect of my life.
In fact, that’s what makes us so damn great.
Reply
A hood is a place to get out of ASAP. The hood is a soul-sucking, suffocating, mind-killing sh*thole. A place any person with brains leaves and never comes back to. Like the cop says, “Move on, people. Nothing to see here”
Reply